If you’re going to choose someone yourself, a concierge service might just be a waste of time.
If you hit it off with a staff member during the interview, I think it’s also fine to build a relationship with them through that connection.
Sometimes I ask for more information when making an offer, but everyone I’m currently seeing long-term is someone I made an offer to immediately and without hesitation.
Those who couldn’t decide right away may have had some doubts or reservations—or perhaps they simply weren’t that high on my list of favorites.
I’ve met someone once for a consultation before, but I didn’t feel that it was necessary.
Thank you for your question. I’ll answer as well.
> I’m not very good at making full use of it myself.
When you have a clearly established preference in women and want to meet someone who fits that preference, you probably know your own tastes more accurately than the staff do, so their recommendations may not resonate much. In that case, I think searching on your own is the best approach.
However, if you regularly tell the staff, “This is the kind of woman I like,” they may recommend someone you overlooked while browsing the member list.
Staff who conduct interviews every day will naturally think of you first when someone who seems to match your preferences joins, as long as they know what you like.
So, if you find it difficult to find someone you like in the member list, and although a woman’s profile may not seem like your type, you’re open-minded enough to think, “The staff recommended her, so maybe I’ll go on a date,” then the concierge service may be useful.
I think the quickest way to communicate your preferences to the staff is through feedback after dates. However, that also means you’ll need to make quite a few offers.
For now, I think it’s best to search on your own. Once you feel you’ve reached your limits, the concierge service might just help you find someone who’s a great match.
I went looking because I wondered if I’d really written something like that, and it turns out it was three years ago:
https://universe-club.jp/column/okunohosomichi3
My current relationship is stable, so I rarely make offers anymore. I’ll answer based on what I remember from that time.
Normally, I look for women to make offers to myself. When I do that, my own preconceived, superficial preferences naturally come through very strongly. That can lead to repeating the same patterns over and over, and eventually feeling bored with them.
At times like that, having a third party present you with candidates instead of choosing for yourself may bring a breath of fresh air. In particular, concierge services often have information that isn’t included in a woman’s profile, and they may use that information to make recommendations.
When I wrote that column, they introduced me to a woman I probably wouldn’t have chosen myself. I ended up seeing her once or twice a week, and that relationship continued for a little over two years.
As for when this approach is useful, I’d say it’s when you’re feeling a bit stuck or confined.
As I mentioned at the beginning, I rarely make offers these days. However, the woman I’ve been seeing most frequently recently was found by another answerer who regularly browses the profiles and thought she would be my type, so he told me about her.
I made an offer to her on a whim, and for some reason, our relationship suddenly developed. Now I sometimes stay over at her place several times a month.
I think it’s important to give the staff plenty of information if you want recommendations that really resonate with you. It’s also important to lay the groundwork by making sure they understand what kind of person you are.
If you use the concierge service a few times, I’m sure they’ll eventually start giving you recommendations that really hit the mark, so give it a try.
