A question about sexually transmitted infections.

I’m Date◎Yume, a male member. I’m with Mac! I think you should simply tell everyone involved that you want an STI check.

I’m Flag Maker, a column writer. I approach them as though I might be the one at fault, even if I believe I’m the victim, and watch how they react. For example: “I thought something was off, so I got tested and found out I have an STD. I may have passed it on to you. I’m really sorry m(_ _)m I’ll pay for it, so please get tested just once m(_ _)m”

I’m Kazu, a male member. Rather than making it about who’s to blame, I think it would be best to explain why you decided to get tested and that you found out you have an STI, then encourage her to get tested as well. Even if you get cured, you’ll just catch it again if the woman you’re seeing is still infected. It’s important for both of you to get treated. She might get angry and accuse you of infecting her, but if that happens, I suppose it simply means you weren’t meant to be. Looking at it another way, it’s a good opportunity to see what kind of person she really is. Adding this after reading Maezawa’s answer: > Come to think of it, I remember Kazu once being accused of the opposite, but saying it was a false accusation. That’s right. A long time ago, when I had sex with my girlfriend for the first time, there was an unusual odor down there. A few days later, on my way home from the clinic where I’d been tested and confirmed negative, I called her and encouraged her to get tested. Apparently, her test came back positive, and she got angry and accused me of infecting her. > It’s also possible that the questioner had already contracted the STI before the test two months ago, but it simply hadn’t shown up yet. > So it may not have come from that woman. I think that’s entirely possible. > In general, people who have had an STI are no longer treated as human beings. When I talk with women I’m seeing, I’m surprised by how many of them have had one before. I often hear that they caught one from fooling around when they were students. I tell the women I’m seeing regularly that I won’t get angry if they catch one, so they should tell me right away. In fact, over the past year or so, two women have honestly told me that they had contracted one.

I’ll answer this as Maezawa from the president’s office. > I’ve only been with one woman since my STI test two months ago. Come to think of it, I believe Kazu once said he’d been accused of the opposite, but that it was a false accusation. It’s also possible that the questioner already had the infection before taking the STI test two months ago, but it simply hadn’t shown up yet. So there’s a chance it wasn’t this woman. > We get along well, so I’d still like to continue seeing her. In that case, I suppose you should get treated first, then see her after you’ve fully recovered and find out whether you become reinfected. Ideally, you should tell her right away. But she may suspect that you were the source, which could bring the relationship to an end. That’s what makes this difficult. If you do get reinfected, you could initially frame it simply as a matter of getting tested: “Let’s both get tested—I’ll pay for the tests.” That might make it easier to suggest. Either way, if you want to continue seeing her, this is going to be quite difficult. P.S. Of course, I assumed you wouldn’t see her until your treatment was complete, since you tested positive. However, there’s also a possibility that she’s negative. > As a general rule, you should promptly notify everyone you’ve been intimate with. That’s absolutely true, but the difficult part is that you still want to continue seeing her. In general, people who have contracted an STI are treated as though they’re no longer acceptable as partners. (That may have been putting it a little too strongly. Once it’s treated, there’s really no need to worry about it.) That said, things would be different if the woman also tested positive. That’s why I suggested encouraging her to get tested first. Of course, the most straightforward thing would be to give up on seeing her and tell her everything directly. Since you had unprotected sex (unless I’m mistaken), I suppose this was bound to happen.