In the question above, Mr. Maezawa from the President’s Office wrote:
> It goes both ways, but I think you should carefully consider whether you’re really in a position to say, “I guess we’re breaking up now,” even if the other person says it.
Conversely, if the other person genuinely doesn’t want to break up with you, then saying “It goes both ways, right?” would be a valid argument.
That’s the comment he left, but does this mean that “men can have as many girls as partners as they want, while girls are expected to stay devoted to just one papa (a male supporter)”?
In my question, I also wrote that since my papa is looking for someone new, he may find someone—so wouldn’t that make it go both ways? (Although posting several questions in a row was inappropriate as a “question.”)
I couldn’t quite understand why those two things aren’t considered equivalent. Is that really how Universe Club sees it…?
Also, in the first question, I found it interesting that Kazu felt sad, thinking, “Maybe there haven’t been any offers.” I had assumed papas wanted to keep their partners all to themselves, haha. Thank you.
I’m Kazu, a male member.
I think Maezawa-san’s answer is meant as advice—or rather, a warning—for situations where the papa is the kind of man who believes:
> Men can have as many girls as they want as partners, but a girl must remain devoted to just one papa.
In other words, he’s saying:
> You should carefully consider whether you’re truly in a position where you’d be okay if she said, “I guess we’re done.”
If you want exclusivity, you’ll have to cover all of the allowance she’s looking for yourself. And since people’s desires tend to grow, you’d probably have to keep increasing the monthly allowance accordingly. That would be exhausting.
Besides, I also want to date multiple women, so it’s more relaxed when we’re both free to do that—and I get to hear more interesting stories.
That said, for example, if a woman asks me to take up her entire papa-katsu schedule and I agree, then I’d probably get annoyed if she continued seeing other papas, because it would feel like she was changing the terms of the arrangement on her own.
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Maezawa from the president’s office here as well.
Thank you for your prompt reply.
Regarding what this means, my understanding is that whether or not he has multiple partners is not particularly relevant.
Even if a man has only been seeing one woman, something minor can make him lose interest and decide to look for someone else.
So even if you feel that it’s simply a case of “what goes around comes around,” the other man may not see it that way and may start looking for another woman.
That said, it depends on how much he likes you.
If he likes you very much, I think the idea of “what goes around comes around” can apply.
In situations like this, the balance of power between the two people also comes into play. And I think the same applies not only to relationships between men and women, but also to workplace relationships.
> Since papa is also looking for someone new and finding someone, it’s only fair.
There are two ways of looking at this.
One possibility is that papa wasn’t actually looking for someone new. Perhaps he was simply browsing the list of women in the same way someone might look through a list of idols, with no intention of making an offer.
The other perspective is that men sometimes believe they are in the stronger position—so-called, “I’m the one paying, which means I have the upper hand.”
Someone who believes they are in the superior position usually won’t see it as a case of “what goes around comes around.”
I hope that came across clearly.
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