Why do men who are naturally prone to falling seriously in love use dating clubs? I can understand it if someone who was originally emotionally detached happened to develop genuine feelings for a woman, but I mean men who are like that from the start. I could understand it if they were married, but many of these men are single and have never been married. When I asked one of them why he didn’t get married, he said he had proposed several times in the past, but had been turned down every time. So I assume he probably falls seriously in love with every woman he dates.
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Wouldn’t people like that be better off using a dating site intended for genuine romantic relationships?
Do they tend to fall for women who are out of their league? (For example, extremely beautiful women may end up marrying men with even better qualifications than theirs.) Since they have a fair amount of money, I would think an average woman might be willing to marry them.
Why would they deliberately choose to pursue a relationship involving money through a dating club—a situation that seems especially painful for someone seeking genuine love?
I’m Taro, a male member.
Dating apps aimed at serious romance often come across as pretty creepy and emotionally heavy. Even with that kind of dating, I’d want it to develop into a healthy relationship, so I find people whose sole purpose is romance off-putting. Ideally, the connection should develop naturally. That’s why I prefer meeting someone in an ordinary setting—say, striking up a conversation with a Starbucks barista—rather than using a dating app.
That said, if you’re only meeting women you happen to see around town, the chances of finding someone you’re attracted to are pretty low. So I think it makes sense to use services that bring together women who are looking for some kind of encounter. It could be a sex-work service, a site where women teach cooking, a hobby class with lots of female participants, or a dating club.
The quality of the venue comes down to the size of the pool multiplied by the participants’ motivation. If I had to say which matters more, though, it’s the sheer size of the pool, so I think Universe is excellent.
That said, it’s just one of many options, so please don’t worry too much. Rather than worrying about other people, perhaps you should worry about yourself.
Sincerely,
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I’m Paper Airplane, a male member.
Normally, you propose after you’ve become a couple and the timing feels right, so you’re rarely turned down.
So getting rejected over and over is abnormal—it’s unbelievably clueless.
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I’m だて◎ゆめ, a male member.
Perhaps it’s because a dating club involves money, so women are less likely to turn you down and you can meet the person you’re interested in relatively easily…?
I think that after meeting, each person begins a relationship on their own terms. But that seems to be where misunderstandings with women who are active in these clubs arise, creating a repeating cycle.
Still, there are probably wealthy, genuinely good men who are different from me, so rather than assuming from the start that it will be a transactional relationship, it might be worth giving it a chance.
I believe that no matter where you meet someone, the real relationship begins after you’ve met.
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Maezawa from the CEO’s office here.
> Why do men who tend to genuinely fall in love get involved with dating clubs in the first place?
The reason is pretty simple.
I think it’s because they know they can at least go on one date with a woman here, and they have this vague fantasy that she might somehow be easy to fool.
Since she’s an ordinary woman, they think, “Maybe I actually have a chance?”
On top of that, because they’re paying, they feel entitled to boss the club around. And if they specifically target women who are new to the club, those women might misunderstand and think, “Is this what dating clubs are like?”—which could lead to them meeting several more times.
That’s probably the idea.
These men simply aren’t suited for participating in a dating club, so if you come across one, please send in as much negative feedback as possible.
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I’m Dai, a male member.
Precisely because I have a fair amount of money, I’m looking for an ideal girlfriend—not a marriage partner.
I’m not interested in women I’d meet through marriage-oriented dating.
I’m divorced once, so I’m single now, but I’m not looking for another marriage because I don’t want to become twice-divorced.
There are also single men who aren’t genuinely looking for love, you know. lol
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I’m Flag Maker, a columnist.
I’d love to see a single respondent who’s genuinely in love among the answerers or columnists, too. I think it’d be kind of cool, in its own way.
Taking on a dating club with real romantic feelings… I mean, that’s kind of badass. Like a warrior heading into certain death.
I’m going to take my shot with the person I’m genuinely in love with before the end of this year. I’ll give it everything I’ve got, but when I start thinking like that, the Antonio Inoki in my head yells, “What kind of idiot thinks about losing before they even step into the ring?!” So I’m going to give it my all with the intention of winning.
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It’s Seattle.
On marriage-oriented dating sites, he’ll mostly meet people around his own age, so maybe he wants to marry someone younger.
If that man earns around $300 million a year, you should marry him, then get divorced right away.
But if he’s just an average guy who’s been rejected by everyone, that’s pretty creepy.
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I’m Aya, a female member.
I honestly find it mysterious that single men register with dating clubs specializing in papa-katsu (compensated dating in Japan). If they’re looking to get married, why not go to a matchmaking service?
Maybe they’ve failed at proposing because they never learned to analyze the right market for themselves and pursue opportunities there.
As long as they’re happy, I suppose that’s all that matters—but from a papa-katsu woman’s perspective, they’re a bit of a curious breed.
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I’m Kazu, a male member.
The moment you start worrying about someone’s “specs,” it’s no longer love.
The fact that you’ve proposed several times and been rejected probably means you aren’t really seeing the other person for who they are. Aren’t you simply repeating the same pattern at a dating club?
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