I don't feel like having an adult relationship (intimate) with my dinner-only papas. It's been almost two months since I left the club, but I still see three men I met through the club for dinner only. Since none of them are the type to immediately want an adult relationship, we continue with dinner only, and they tell me that an adult relationship can happen on my own terms. However, I have no financial need to enter into an adult relationship with these dinner-only papas because I already receive enough support from other papas. My sexual needs are also being met separately from my papas, so... And I already have plenty of savings...
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To be honest, I only think of these dinner-only papas as a way to pass the time. We eat delicious food, chat, and I get 10,000 yen—something like that. So honestly, I'm perfectly happy continuing with dinner only, but from the men's perspective, they probably wouldn't be satisfied with that, right? Even though they say it's on my terms, I don't actually want to do it, so I'm conflicted. I might want to if I ever needed the money, but I already have plenty of savings and won't have financial problems in the future.
If I never have an adult relationship with them, will they eventually end things themselves?
I’m Dai, a male member.
If you’ve clearly turned down an adult relationship (intimate) and he’s still continuing with dinner-only (no intimacy), I think your current relationship will continue.
But if he’s hoping to have an adult relationship (intimate) eventually, he’ll probably end things with you after a while.
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I’m だて◎ゆめ, a male member.
In my case, we ended up having a normal older-man/younger-woman relationship, with me covering the dinner bills and no allowance（笑）. We met a few more times after that, but she eventually broke things off.
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I’m Paper Airplane, a male member.
I have a few girls like that.
I don’t go out of my way to end things, and I don’t contact them either. I don’t mind if we stop messaging.
But they still reach out to me.
Since I’m intimate with another girl, there’s no longer any need for intimacy with them. In fact, intimacy means having to coordinate schedules, so I’m almost relieved that things have become dinner-only.
Honestly, I see it as little more than dinner and a way to pass the time—just enjoying a nice meal and chatting.
So I’m perfectly happy to keep things dinner-only, but I get the impression they think a man wouldn’t be satisfied with that. Even when they tell me, “Whenever you’re ready,” I don’t particularly want to take things further; I just ask out of habit and as a social nicety.
Also, to the person who asked the question: Is your LINE name just a single letter or written in Roman characters?
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I’m Aya, a female member.
They probably will cut things off… I’ve been through the same thing. I enjoyed spending time together, but I didn’t really want things to go as far as going to a hotel, so I just kept smiling. Then, about six months later, he said something like, “Maybe this isn’t going to work with you anymore,” and that was the end of it. Still, it was an amicable breakup, so I’m not bothered by it. You may just have to accept that it can’t be helped.
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