I’m BB7.
Whether it’s 30,000, 40,000, 50,000, or 100,000 yen, I think you should simply state what you want.
Whether the man agrees or not is a matter between the two of you. It’s not something for outsiders to comment on.
I’m Maezawa from the President’s Office, and I’ll answer this too.
> If I’m asked about my terms, is it okay to say “4,” since that’s the minimum amount I’d be happy to receive?
Since you’re being asked about your terms, I think it’s perfectly natural to state the minimum amount you want.
But why 4? That was my first thought.
In Japan, 3, 5, 7, and 8 are traditionally considered lucky amounts for congratulatory gifts.
(If you usually receive amounts in the double digits or more, just carry on as usual. Haha.)
Since this is a valuable connection, matching the amount to a traditional gift feels more appropriate.
Also, regarding what Kazu wrote about adding “if possible,” I agree that it’s surprisingly powerful.
So if asked, I think it would be good to say:
“I’d prefer 5, if possible…”
(5 isn’t mandatory—it’s just better to avoid unlucky numbers like 4. 7 or 8 would be fine too, and I think even 10 would be okay.)
Of course, this is simply you communicating your preference, so several things could happen afterward:
1. The man might say, “That amount is difficult for me, so let’s end things here today.”
2. He might offer 3, which is the amount he had in mind.
3. He might agree to 5 as is.
Incidentally, allowances on apps seem to have been increasing lately, and 3 appears to be becoming the standard.
Until a little while ago, I remember 1.5 or 2 being more common.
Perhaps allowances on apps have gone up because fewer women started using them during the pandemic.
Of course, there’s always a divide, so I’m sure some women still accept 2.0 or 1.5. But if 3 is becoming the standard on apps, I feel women in dating clubs can reasonably turn down 3.
If all the women registered with Universe stood together and refused anything below 3, allowances would naturally rise to 5 or more.
(Or 4 or more, if a lot of people aren’t hesitant about even numbers.)
Honestly, I think women should recognize their own value a little more.
Some men apparently lecture them, saying things like, “Do you realize how hard I worked to earn this much?”
But women should be able to say:
“Don’t think you can have me for that little.”
At the very least, that’s what I’d like to hear them say. Haha.
Of course, if the man is exactly their type, then any amount is fine.
I’m Osaka, a male member.
It depends on how many offers you have and what you negotiate, right?
I don’t know your exact goals or reasons, but I think you’re being careful and doing a smart job of turning offers into successful arrangements. You’re clever.
Once you have a little more flexibility, I think it would be fine to try a “what if” approach.
“How about this? I usually ask for 50,000 yen, but what would you prefer, ○○? I don’t want to lose you, so I’m willing to do my best even for 40,000 yen!”
Something like that?
I’m Kazu, a male member.
There’s a perfect phrase for someone like you: “if possible.” It’s a good idea to add it.
When I ask women what they’re hoping for, I often hear, “If possible, I’d prefer ◯.” Just adding “if possible” makes it sound a little more modest and refined.
Personally, I find four to be a bit awkward, so I’d rather you just say five.
