This is Saito, the column writer♪
When turning someone down, if you suggest several alternative dates and say, “I’m available on this date,” it makes it easier for them to reach out with another offer.
Speaking from personal experience.
I’m Maezawa from the CEO’s office, and I’ll answer this one too.
This may sound rude, but there are women who are like the eternal number two.
A man will think it over and over, ask the staff questions, even ask what shade of hair color she has—like, “The photo makes it look brown, but how brown exactly?”—and finally make an offer.
Then he’s happy because a date has been set and looks forward to it, only to suddenly become a close contact and be unable to go.
When that happens, he’ll immediately think, “I should ask this woman first next time.” That’s why she’s number two.
If the date had happened, they might have hit it off and started a long-term relationship. But because the timing is so specific, their schedules don’t line up and it keeps falling through.
You’d think being number two means the next date offer would come around, but before that happens, another woman he wants to offer appears, and she ends up becoming the runner-up again.
So there are women who are always on the list of candidates but never actually receive an offer.
Anyway, getting back to the point:
As for what you should do, I think you should try going on the date—even if you have to take a day off work.
You might have a wonderful encounter there, or you might end up thinking, “I took time off for this?”
But if you don’t go, you’ll keep wondering about it, so I think it’s worth giving it a try.
I’m Nana Ayase ♡
The way you received that offer makes me think it wasn’t intended specifically for you, but was sent out to several girls who might be available.
It’s probably the kind of offer where the man tells the staff the date and time, the approximate age he’s looking for, and the sort of vibe he prefers.
I’m sure the staff are also keeping a close eye on things so that everyone has a chance to receive offers.
I’m Dai, a male member.
I try to think that when our schedules don’t line up, it simply wasn’t meant to be.
That said, if the woman seems willing to meet, I may make another offer for a different date.
Keep replying politely and wait to see if she reaches out again.
By the way, I’m planning to make another offer soon to a woman who turned me down in August because our schedules didn’t work out.
I’m Kazu, a male member.
There’s nothing you can do about it. papa-katsu (compensated dating in Japan) is just something you do on the side, so I think it’s fine as it is.
