If the meeting place isn’t a restaurant, is it okay to ask what kind of place we’re going to—or even the name of the restaurant—while making the arrangements?
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I can’t help getting my hopes up, so I head there dressed up, but it’s often such a casual place, full of people in jeans and sneakers, that I get stared at and feel out of place, as if everyone thinks, “With that age gap and those clothes, this must be papa-katsu (compensated dating in Japan),” and I stand out.
I’d frame it as simply wanting to confirm the dress code, but would men find that annoying?
I’m not planning to show up in jeans and sneakers—I just want to dress appropriately without standing out.
Maezawa from the President’s Office here as well.
Some men haven’t decided on a restaurant. They’ll meet up, head to an area with lots of restaurants, and say, “Where do you want to go?” I do wish they’d think a little more about how the woman feels, but they seem to assume that letting her choose her favorite place means they’re being considerate. It feels a bit different to me, though…
So even if you ask during the arrangement, with men like that, you probably won’t get a clear answer—they’ll say something like, “We’ll decide after we meet.”
Still, it’s perfectly fine to ask something along the lines of, “I’m just curious what kind of restaurant it is.”
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I’m Nana Ayase♡
I don’t usually wear dresses because they can stand out. Even in the lobby of a luxury hotel, a dress can make it look obviously like papa-katsu.
I think a skirt with a not-too-flashy top works well. Something office-casual that looks work-appropriate probably attracts the least suspicion.
I think the men feel less embarrassed that way too.
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I’m Kazu, a male member.
I think that’s perfectly fine.
If she asked something like, “I’d like to choose what to wear, so could you tell me what kind of restaurant you’ll be taking me to?” I’d probably reply with the name of the restaurant.
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