I’m だて◎ゆめ, a male member.
> Do you ever give them some kind of test to find out what they’re really like?
I’ve never tested anyone. I try to get a sense of their true character through our usual interactions.
> Have you ever had an unexpected situation that ultimately revealed someone’s true nature?
We were both busy, and after canceling a plan I’d made, our schedules just wouldn’t line up. Then she told me she really wanted to meet once more this month, even if only for a short time.
I thought, “Ah, so it’s about the money…” and turned her down.
She hasn’t made any unreasonable requests since then.（笑）
I’m Adventure Merchant, a column writer.
I’d like to break down the idea of someone’s “true nature” into two possibilities:
1. Do they genuinely like and care about us?
2. Are they only trying to get as much money out of us as possible?
Regarding the first point, I think we can only determine that through the relationship as a whole. Of course, there are obvious signs, such as replying quickly or going to the hair salon and nail salon before meeting so they can show up looking their best. But even without those visible signs, there are things we can “feel” when we talk, kiss, or look into each other’s eyes.
Gradually deepening that emotional connection is one of the enjoyable aspects of meeting someone through a dating club.
As for the second point, I think you can avoid it to some extent by setting a few personal rules. For example:
- If she asks for an increase in her allowance within the first two months, start moving toward ending the relationship.
- Never agree to requests for an advance, such as money for moving expenses.
- Don’t fall for lines like, “I’m seeing another papa right now, but if you increased my allowance, I could focus exclusively on you…”
- If a woman says she wants to go shopping, end things with her sooner rather than later.
Those are a few examples.
If you set one or two standards like these in advance, you’re less likely to be deceived in an unreasonable way.
One rule I’ve recently set for myself is:
“Starting a monthly arrangement too early is too generous to the woman, so I’ll continue on a pay-per-meeting basis for at least two months.”
That said, the woman I once thought, “Ah, that was a mistake,” is a different person from the woman in front of me now. So perhaps it isn’t wise to make your standards too strict, either.
In short, the point is to think calmly whenever you decide on various rules.(^^)/
I’m Saito, a columnist♪
>Do you ever give someone some kind of test to find out what they’re really like?
This may not exactly answer the question, but I usually let the woman make the decisions, except that I choose the hotel myself.
That generally gives me a sense of what kind of life she leads and how she thinks.
There’s another reason, too: I don’t like falling into a routine. I’m always looking for something new or hoping to make some kind of discovery.
Some women use papa-katsu dinners to review restaurants, and there are even women like Watanabe from Unjash.
They’ll say, “Just let me choose the restaurant.” Most of the places they pick are new to me. They’ll tell me things like, “That restaurant went downhill after the chef changed.”
So, in the end, I let them make the decisions because I want to hear about things I don’t know about...
That’s probably the conclusion I’ve come to.
