Maezawa from the Corporate Planning Office here as well.
I think it depends on whether “three days ago” means you canceled at the last minute on the day, or whether you told him three days before your scheduled date that you had to cancel.
Since you said you weren’t feeling well, I’m assuming you canceled on the day itself.
If so, the man had probably been really looking forward to it, adjusting his work schedule for that day. He may even have canceled other appointments or meetings because he had plans with you.
That’s why being stood up at the last minute is extremely upsetting. If he had made various reservations, he may also have incurred damages—possibly tens of thousands of yen in cancellation fees.
Also, regarding the agreement of 80,000 yen for two times: if that meant meeting once and having an adult relationship (intimate) twice, rather than meeting twice for 80,000 yen, then even if you were paid 45,000 yen instead, I feel that, if it was only this one time, it may be something you just have to accept.
That said, if there’s one issue, it’s this:
“If that was the case, I wish you had told me before we got intimate.”
That is a perfectly valid point.
If he had told you that beforehand, you would have had the option of ending things right there, so I do think the man was at fault in that respect.
Taking everything into account, if my assumptions above are correct, it sounds like the questioner may have been in the wrong. However, considering the final point, the man also seems to have behaved badly.
I think it would be best to end things.
In your case, I think you should look for a man who is tolerant enough to accept even last-minute cancellations.
I’m a Rula member of UC for male members and the new salon.
No, that isn’t normal. The man doesn’t come across as gentlemanly at all. You’d probably be better off ending things with him.
You said he told you:
> “So, you’re not sorry for canceling at the last minute?”
But the “so” in that sentence makes no sense. The logic that “you regretted canceling at the last minute, therefore it’s only natural to reduce your allowance” is clearly absurd.
Some people use “so” to steer things in a direction that benefits them, and I think you’re better off staying away from them.
Here’s a conversation I recently had with a man I’ll call A. It was completely harmless and became a funny example of how people misuse “so.”
Me: “I’m thinking of giving my girlfriend ◎◎ as a present next time.”
A: “Oh, nice! Then you should give me some ◎◎ too!”
Me: “A, that ‘then’ doesn’t really make sense there（笑）.”
A: “Oh, you’re right W. It makes you think, ‘Then what exactly does “then” refer to?’（笑）（笑）”
I really hope you find someone who uses “so” like this:
“Your health wasn’t great last time, so we had to reschedule our date. Are you feeling better now?”
“Yes, I’m fine. I’m sorry about that.”
“Good, good. Since things must have been tough for you, I’ll give you a little extra allowance just for today.”
