I’m a man. For example, if we spend about half a day together watching a movie, going for a drive, having a meal, or going on a date—without intimacy—how do you usually handle the allowance? Do you give the same amount as when intimacy is involved? Or do you just cover transportation? From a woman’s perspective, would you want the same amount since you’re spending the same amount of time?

I’m a rule-setter for UC male members and new salon members. In my case, I simply distinguish between arrangements with intimacy and those without, so I don’t really think in terms of time spent together. That means even if we spend about five hours together watching a movie and having dinner, I only give her transportation money. On the other hand, even if we meet at a hotel, are intimate, and part ways after just over an hour, I still give her the amount for an arrangement with intimacy. This applies in the early stages of seeing someone. The women I continue seeing eventually move to a monthly arrangement, so once we agree on a monthly amount, I pay that fixed amount whether we’re intimate once or three times during, say, three meetings that month. After switching to a monthly arrangement, we agree to be intimate at least once a month. Beyond that, things happen naturally between us—some months it’s three times, and other months it’s once.