Thank you for all your answers about my question on being affectionate during an overseas date.
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When we traveled, if I cuddled up to him or held his hand, he would say, “If you’re going to do that, I’ll do this to you,” then put his hand inside my clothes and try to touch my breasts. He also deep-kissed me whenever he got the chance, and repeatedly groped my breasts. When I got fed up and stopped cuddling up to him, he got angry.
When I was with my boyfriend, being affectionate meant hugging or holding hands, so I’ve always felt that touching someone’s breasts was more like foreplay. When he did that to me constantly, it made me feel as though he was only interested in my body, which made me sad—even though this was through a dating club. Do men generally want to be physically intimate throughout an entire trip?
After reading everyone’s answers, I can understand why some people feel that the woman has to initiate affection too.
In the end, he yelled at and scolded me for not being affectionate enough, and we parted ways. Later, he seemed to have calmed down and invited me on another date, but after seeing his attitude this time, I’m thinking I should avoid meeting him—and perhaps avoid traveling with men from the dating club altogether for a while.
Thank you so much for all your responses.
I’ll spend some enjoyable time with someone else.
・I’m posting from a different Wi-Fi network, so my ID may change.
👤Asked byGuest👩GenderFemale🎂Not stated👑Universe female member
“Keep that up and I’ll do this to you, okay?”
That line alone gives me the creeps. You’d have to be pretty bold to say something like that.
If it were me, I’d get away from him. I’d probably have an allergic reaction.
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> When it happens regularly, it makes me feel like they’re only after my body, which is sad—even though this is a dating club.
Papa-katsu men feel the opposite. It makes them sad when it feels like you’re only after their money—even though this is a dating club. That’s why they want affection.
- During dates, the woman should be the one to initiate affection.
- But the man shouldn’t reciprocate by initiating it himself.
I make this my golden rule. When I do, women naturally keep showing affection throughout the date. If they don’t, it’s over.
By “affection,” I don’t necessarily mean wanting them to cling to me or anything that intense. As long as I can tell that they like me, that’s enough.
My regular partner whom I call “Queen” doesn’t act particularly affectionate, but it’s very clear that she genuinely likes me. With someone like Queen, I don’t need that kind of affection at all.
Try practicing how to convey that you like your papa, even without being physically affectionate. Even the respondents here who say, “I don’t need that,” still want to be liked. They’re just hiding it.
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The papa-katsu (compensated dating in Japan) market is completely dominated by papas—it’s a buyer’s market. But sellers still need to choose their customers carefully, or they’ll eventually blow up.
Even in declining industries that are shrinking overall, some companies continue to thrive. And even in a country with a declining population like Japan, some businesses keep succeeding.
The overall market conditions are separate from the success of individual companies and sole proprietors, so keep doing your best!!
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You made it back safely from your trip abroad. Welcome home!
As you mentioned, I’d really rather not travel with someone I met through papa-katsu (compensated dating in Japan). Even when I’m asked, I turn it down—and as you said, I think it’s better not to do it.
Let’s keep enjoying this with people we can both feel comfortable and stress-free around.
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Whether it’s a relationship through a dating club or papa-katsu (compensated dating in Japan), I think it makes a huge difference.
In a relationship—or even in papa-katsu—the woman may want to travel, visit different places, and try various things together…
But if it’s papa-katsu, I think it’s better not to expect or ask for those kinds of things from each other.
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Personally, I don’t want people getting overly familiar for no reason—it’s annoying. It also turns me off because it feels like an unpopular hostess who mistakenly thinks she can win over customers just by being clingy.
Lumping people together with broad generalizations like “men are…” or based on their gender is pretty stupid.
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I agree. It’s best to part ways with that papa.
You should avoid a papa who would end things during an enjoyable trip simply because he felt there wasn’t enough affection. He’ll probably cut you off over other trivial things in the future, too.
Traveling can be difficult in papa-katsu (compensated dating in Japan)—even couples sometimes end up arguing on trips.
If you find a papa you can trust and feel comfortable being yourself around, then traveling or staying overnight together could be worth considering.
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