To be honest, this is something no one really knows for sure.
Based on my experience, I’ve been able to date women without any problems even with an allowance of 30,000–40,000 yen when they weren’t getting many offers.
However, I have had women who were receiving a lot of offers negotiate for a higher allowance later on.
Since raising it to 50,000 yen, I’ve been able to date regardless of how many offers they receive, and no one has tried to negotiate for more.
For me, I think this is probably the sweet spot.
After making offers to around 30 women, I feel like I’ve settled into my own dating style.
I’d recommend that you keep making offers until you figure out what works best for you and where your ideal negotiating line is.
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Whether the questioner is good-looking, matches the woman’s preferred type, and has a good personality—those factors will also affect what allowance a woman feels comfortable with.
Even if you hear that someone else is doing well with a certain allowance, that doesn’t mean you’ll have the same results with the same amount.
With that in mind, if you don’t want to make her uncomfortable, as Kazu says, I don’t think many women would be upset if you offered 150,000 yen on a pay-per-meeting basis.
The reason is that I’ve never heard anyone say, “I only got 150,000 yen from the woman I met—isn’t that awful?”
That said, when the amount is in the tens of thousands of yen, I have heard women complain even when the offer was close to the upper end.
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I don’t think there’s a going rate that applies to everyone.
As I’ve said many times, the going rate is different for each individual. If I had to give a rough estimate, I’d say, “More than 90% of women would probably ask for between 30,000 and 100,000 yen.”
To avoid making your partner uncomfortable, offering 150,000 yen should be a safe bet. I say that based on having met more than 100 women and never having anyone ask for more than 110,000 yen.
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The median is 50,000 yen.
From there, the amount increases depending on your popularity, how much competition there is, your class, and how strongly the man feels about you.
Whether transportation costs are included or separate is about a 50/50 split, so make sure to clarify that and negotiate accordingly.
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