It’s been three months since the papa I loved so much faded out on me. I can’t stop thinking about him, so I’ve been proactively accepting new offers to help me forget. But I still can’t. He was married and almost 60, and more than 20 years older than me, yet what we had felt like genuine “pretend romance.” After a breakup, how do you forget someone, move on, and let go? I want to immerse myself in a new “pretend romance” as soon as possible.

I met my wonderful papa (a male supporter) about a year after parting ways with someone like that. I love him even more than the person I broke up with. Timing plays a part, but you may need a little more time to heal. Marika

I think your papa (a male supporter) was trying to look out for you, too. Whether to fade out, meet and talk things through, or explain it over LINE or in a message—there are probably all kinds of opinions, but I feel that F.O. was the best option your papa could think of. No matter what choice you make, breakups are painful. The only thing I can think of is finding something you can really immerse yourself in—maybe something you’ve never tried before. It’s great to keep accepting new offers, but I also think taking on a new challenge in a completely different area could help. If you’re feeling lonely, you could find a place for yourself in a girls’-night-out kind of community. Rather than trying to force yourself to forget, starting something new will update your memories before you even realize it. —It’s me

Whenever you experience something similar in a relationship, you’ll only end up remembering how your previous partner was and feeling empty. Try doing something different to help you move on instead—like getting a full-time job and working hard, getting your driver’s license, or taking up a new hobby such as yoga. Focus on something other than romance.