I feel like she isn’t really interested in me. How would you handle a situation like this?
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Nice to meet you. I’m a man in my 30s who always refers to this Q&A for advice while participating in papa-katsu (compensated dating in Japan).
There’s a woman around my age whom I’ve met about four times over the past two months or so.
I really like her appearance and personality. At first, she would say things after our dates like, “I had such a great time today,” and “I’d love to see you again soon,” so I hoped we could continue seeing each other. However, her replies have gradually become slower, and she no longer seems to enjoy our conversations as much as she used to. I’ve started to feel that she’s lost interest in me.
In a situation like this, should I continue seeing her casually without giving up and wait to see if she eventually develops feelings for me, or should I cut things off cleanly and start meeting other women?
👤Asked byGuest👨GenderMale🎂30s👑Universe male member
> Should I cut things off cleanly and see how I get along with different women?
I think you can meet different women without cutting things off.
What matters is whether things go smoothly with other women as well.
If you end up having the same experience with other women, it seems there may be some issue—perhaps you’re not very interesting to talk to, or the venues you choose aren’t that great.
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With Fuu, I’d continue for now while keeping an eye on things.
I’d try to observe her and draw her out by asking things like, “Is something bothering you?” or saying, “You seem a little down lately.”
At the same time, I’d look for other women, just in case we ended up parting ways.
At first, you may work hard for the money because you want to secure an ongoing arrangement, but it’s natural for your enthusiasm to gradually fade.
If it’s within a range you can accept, I think you could continue seeing this woman while also finding others, dating multiple women, and spreading out your feelings.
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When it comes to my approach to relationships, I try to be honest about almost everything—except for being vague about my profession.
The women I date all know this.
So if I feel that a woman isn’t enjoying herself, I’ll first ask her directly why.
Depending on the reason, I may consider fixing anything I’m doing wrong. There’s also a chance we may decide to part ways.
I want to have an equal relationship with the women I date, where we can be open and tell each other anything.
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The higher the allowance, the more they like you. The lower the allowance, the less they like you. That’s all there is to it.
I give generous allowances, so all my monthly-arrangement partners really love me—not because I’m an easy mark or an ATM, but because they genuinely do. (；∀；)
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