I’m the person who previously asked about keeping a conversation going. https:\/\/universe-club.jp\/help\/questions\/view\/11646
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Thank you for your answer.
I think you’re right that, in my case, money turns into interest in the other person.
My thought process is something like: interest sparked by the money → learning about the other person’s hobbies and preferences → becoming interested in them myself and matching their enthusiasm.
Basically, I don’t talk about myself unless I’m asked. So when the other person isn’t able to keep the conversation going, it ends up with me knowing a lot about them while they know practically nothing about me.
That situation makes me feel really sad. I start wondering if they’re not interested in me.
How can I get the other person to learn more about me?
It feels strange to just go on and on about myself when they haven’t asked, and I don’t know how to get them interested in me.
👤Asked byGuest👩GenderFemale🎂20s👑Universe female member
If you’re able to keep the conversation going back and forth, why not talk about yourself too? Your papa (a male supporter) probably wants to get to know you as well. Once he knows what kind of person you are, he can decide whether he likes you even more—or not.
Actually, many papas think, “I can’t be interested in a girl who doesn’t tell me anything about herself,” or “It feels like she hasn’t opened up to me.”
So I think you should be brave and talk a little more. When I feel, “I want to become close with this papa,” I share quite personal things from the very first date—sometimes enough to make me think, “Maybe I talked too much.” If he asks how I got started with papa-katsu (compensated dating in Japan), the conversation naturally turns into my personal history, too.
That’s just my experience, but I’ve never had it backfire. So I think you should try being more open and talk about yourself, too.
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Many men registered with dating clubs are highly capable at work, but struggle with communication within the company.
The age gap can also make things difficult, and men often wonder what to talk about to keep the conversation lively.
I often get the conversation flowing by talking about my own hobbies. But before and after becoming intimate, the level of closeness deepens, and it becomes much easier to talk.
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Sorry for the somewhat indirect answer.
I’m good at having face-to-face conversations, but I rarely ask women questions. I’m hesitant to pry into their privacy.
So, on dinner dates, I usually start by talking about myself. I try to keep the topics related to the woman’s profile as much as possible. If she’s interested in food, I might talk about my own tastes. If her profile says she wants to start her own business, I might casually bring up entrepreneurship and see how she reacts.
I suppose it’s like lure fishing: you cast out the bait and wait for a response.
You seem confident in your communication skills, so try taking the lead by talking about yourself a little first. Watch how she responds, and when she shows interest in a topic, expand on it. I think the conversation will naturally pick up from there.
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As I said in my answer, I don’t think it’s that he has no interest in you. He simply doesn’t know how to keep the conversation going because he lacks the communication skills.
If you want him to get to know you, you can use your communication skills to weave information about yourself into the questions you ask in return.
Using the earlier topic of his dog as an example:
You: “What kind of dog do you have?”
Him: “I have a ○○.”
You: “I have a ○○ too,” or “Oh, I love ○○!”
That’s what I mean. In my opinion, being able to keep the other person’s side of the conversation going as well is an even higher level of communication skill.
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