I have a papa (a male supporter) I only see occasionally and only contact when necessary.
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When I was just arranging our next meeting, he said, “By the way, our next meeting is the day before my birthday!” Should I prepare a gift or something? If we were close, I’d be happy to celebrate with him, but…
I have another question as well. Recently, this papa (a male supporter) has started calling me by my first name without any honorific, and it bothers me. Would it be a bad idea to gently tell him that I don’t like being addressed that way?
Thank you.
I’m Aya, a female member.
・About birthday presents
→As others have said, convenience-store sweets should be fine. You could also get a box of Tirol chocolates for around 300 yen. If you go to Don Quijote, they sell things like large bags of Umaibo for a few hundred yen, as well as candy-store-style snacks, so something like that could be fun as a joke gift. You might want to at least tie a ribbon around it.
・About being called by your first name without honorifics
→How about telling him how you’d like to be addressed, like, “Hey, call me ○○!”?
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I’m Date◎Yume, a male member.
> Would it be a bad idea to hint at it gently?
I think so.
There have been times when someone tried to hint at something to me, but I couldn’t understand what they meant at all.
This is one of those times when you need to be firm! Let’s make sure to say it clearly.
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I’m Dai, a male member.
Both situations are happening because the papas mistakenly think they’ve become closer to you.
I think it’s more advantageous for women in various ways to let them keep believing that.
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I’m Kazu, a male member.
Maybe he didn’t mean anything by it, but if it was a hint for more, an allowance-seeking papa (a male supporter) is pretty annoying. Why not smooth things over with a convenience-store dessert?
Being addressed without an honorific would understandably irritate you, but if you want to keep seeing each other without causing friction, it’s probably safest to let it slide.
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