I never seem to click with outgoing, high-energy men.

Question

When I try to match their energy and say something, I feel like they briefly give me this look as if to say, “Huh? What’s with her? (lol)” I don’t know how else to put it, but overall, it feels like we’re just not on the same wavelength. Sometimes they even go expressionless while I’m trying hard to keep the conversation going. I end up feeling pathetic, like someone desperately trying to keep up with the popular kid in class. Naturally, my arrangements with that type of man rarely continue. On the other hand, quiet, gentlemanly men in their 60s and older tend to take a liking to me. How can I get better at talking to these kinds of men?

Answer 1

I’m Paper Airplane, a male member. I really don’t get along with pushy, macho types or overly flashy, high-energy people—whether they’re men or women. I think it’s best when both people can just be themselves naturally, without forcing anything. That way, there’s less burden and stress for everyone.

Answer 2

People with that flashy, high-energy vibe seem to talk a lot. So I think it’s best to focus on being a good listener and let them enjoy talking, just chiming in with the occasional acknowledgment. They’ll probably slip in a bit of bragging here and there, but that’s part of the charm. Marika

Answer 3

I’m Aya, a female member. When it comes to flashy, confident older men, I think it’s best to just be yourself rather than trying too hard to match their energy. Instead of thinking of him as a flashy type, try treating him as just another person and interacting with him on equal footing.

Answer 4

I’m Kazu, a male member. I think it’s best not to force yourself to match her energy—just be yourself and go at your own pace.

I never seem to click with outgoing, high-energy men.

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I never seem to click with outgoing, high-energy men.

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