It’s been almost two years since I joined. I’ve continued seeing two girls once or twice a month.
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Since we know each other well, it’s comfortable and easy.
But lately, our messages have been kept to a minimum, and they don’t even say thank you when I give them their allowance anymore.
I don’t want to stop seeing them, but is this just how it is?
I have to admit, it feels a little lonely....
I’m Dai, a male member.
If you look at it as “she feels that comfortable and secure with you,” I’d say that’s a much better relationship than simply receiving a perfunctory thank-you.
If you’re unhappy with the woman you’re currently seeing, try making an offer to someone new.
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I’m Kazu, a male member.
When things start heading in that direction, I try to say what’s on my mind. For example, “I’m happy we’ve gotten close, but you’ve been letting your guard down lately.” Something like that.
I think there are some things that won’t get across unless you say them.
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I’m Meg, a female member.
That sounds incredibly lonely… And not even receiving a thank-you for the allowance seems rather thoughtless.
I’ve been doing this for almost two years now, but it’s been a very eventful two years. I’ve never failed to send a message, and I always express my gratitude right away.
Could it be that the girls’ feelings have started to drift away from you? Have things become too familiar, and have you started treating them carelessly?
If you don’t want them to leave, it might be worth taking a moment to reflect on things.
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I’m Date◎Yume, a male member.
> I don’t want to leave, but I guess this is just how it is?
> It does feel a little lonely....
That does sound lonely....
I’ve been seeing my partner for three years, but things aren’t like that for us. In my case, it’s strictly a mutually agreed-upon transactional relationship within the club’s framework, of course—but if anything, things are better now than when we first started seeing each other.
Here’s how our arrangement works:
- We always exchange messages back and forth every day.
- We always go on two dates a month—generally every other week, though occasionally more than twice.
- The allowance is a fixed monthly amount, whether or not we have an adult relationship.
- When we meet, we catch up on anything we couldn’t talk about through messages since our last date.
- I share lessons from my own experience, offer advice on personal concerns, and give guidance on cooking, beauty, H, manners, work, and investing（笑）
I’m not sure whether she’s actually listening or just playing dumb, but my cooking and H lessons seem to have had no effect（笑）
I think we both enjoy spending time together.
There’s an age gap of over 40 years, so it’s not exactly a lovey-dovey relationship. It’s not serious love—it’s serious transactional dating（笑）
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I’m a male member, Paper Airplane.
If you narrow it down to just one person and start meeting three to five times a month, I think things will change.
Meeting once or twice a month is pretty much what you’d expect. It’s a relationship that’s just right for seeing each other occasionally—nothing more, nothing less. There’s no need for it to end, and it can continue as it is.
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Maezawa from the CEO’s office here.
If you’ve been seeing each other for two years, I think you’ve reached the point where you can say what you really want to say.
In that case, you could say something like, “It makes me happy when you say thank you after I give you your allowance.” I think she’d start saying it.
Maybe the reason things have lasted this long is because your emails have been kept to a minimum.
You can simply talk when you meet, so if you want someone to exchange emails with, it might be better to look for a pen pal separately.
If email is all you’re looking for, there seem to be plenty of people on dating sites—maybe it costs 100 yen per message?
You could probably exchange as many emails as you want there, though it’s questionable whether the person is really a woman.
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I’m Mack, a male member.
It’s much better than having a woman genuinely fall for you and pressure you to get married or divorced. If things start feeling unsatisfying, just make an offer to someone new and you can enjoy that fresh excitement again.
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