I’m a man considering joining. How do men and women at the club usually keep in touch?
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- Is it safer to avoid using your personal mobile number?
- Do people exchange text messages despite accepting the risks?
- Since LINE often reveals your name, do people use a free email address instead?
- Do they carry two phones and use them separately?
I’d appreciate hearing what others do for reference.
Thank you.
Maezawa from Shacho-shitsu here.
Thank you for your question.
When communicating between the club and its members, men generally use email—Yahoo Mail or Gmail, for example—while women almost always use LINE.
As for communicating with your partner after the first meeting, I think it depends on the person. Until fairly recently, quite a few women didn’t want to share their LINE contact information.
In that case, Kakao might be a good alternative.
So, if both you and the other person are okay with it, use LINE. Otherwise, Kakao. And if they don’t use Kakao, perhaps you could speak directly by phone?
I get the impression that women may be slow to read emails, but I wonder if that’s really the case.
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I’m Taro, a male member.
You’re worrying too much, lol.
Most people are perfectly normal, so there’s no real danger. Even when someone seems sketchy, about 80% of the time they’re all talk, so you’ll be fine.
Just take responsibility for your own safety. If I had to put it bluntly, most trouble comes from people getting themselves into it.
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I’m Hikouki, a male member.
I use my real name on LINE for the most part. To avoid any mix-ups, I don’t use LINE with my family.
So I won’t look suspicious, I deliberately leave my phone out in the open whenever I step away, whether I’m at home, dining out, or traveling. I don’t take it with me to the bathroom or shower. I also use it every day in a way that wouldn’t raise questions if my wife happened to look through my phone or LINE.
That said, unless you already had a girlfriend and nothing about your behavior changed, it may take quite a bit of effort to avoid getting caught.
Also, being open about things like your real name and occupation means you naturally can’t act carelessly or end things badly. But in terms of building a relationship, that can actually be an advantage, since you’re required to behave in a way that earns the woman’s trust.
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I keep work and personal matters separate, so I carry two phones.
With the men I see, we decide whether to use LINE, Kakao, or SMS, depending on their preference. On LINE and Kakao, I use my real first name. The phone itself, as well as LINE and Kakao, are all locked.
I don’t have a separate phone exclusively for papa-katsu (compensated dating in Japan).
What scares me most is accidentally sending a message to the wrong person because of my own carelessness. Once, I meant to send a message to my mother but sent it to one of the men instead, and he read it before I could delete it. I was embarrassed that he saw a family conversation, but that was all. Thinking about the reverse scenario gives me chills.
Are you worried about things like stalking or the man’s wife finding out? I can’t say much about the former, but in the latter case, if he normally leaves his phone out in the open and has never used a lock, then suddenly starts keeping it with him and acting secretive, his wife will notice. I think how he behaved before is what really matters.
Marika
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