I always enjoy reading this site.

I'm Paper Airplane, a male member who's never met anyone because of circumstances on the men's side. I'm just bored, honestly… So it really depends on how things go when we meet and what mood we're both in. If it's only once or twice a month, then if we don't have much time, we'd have to make it hotel-only, right? If she's a C-type, that is. If it's four or five times a month, that's a different story…

I’m だて◎ゆめ, a male member. Since I only meet her twice a month, I give her an allowance regardless of whether we spend time together as an adult relationship, over dinner, or just tea. Otherwise, her income wouldn’t be stable...

I’m Flag Maker, a column writer. I’d never pull a bait-and-switch like that, lol. Basically, I assume they’re more interested in the allowance than in me as a person, so I can’t bring myself to invite someone out for a dinner-only date. I end up feeling kind of bad about it. The other day, someone invited me out, but I turned her down because I didn’t have much money to spare. She said, “I’d still like to see you, even if it’s just for dinner!” I said, “Huh? I could only pay around ¥X,000 for dinner—are you okay with that?” She replied, “I’d be happy just to have dinner with you!” So I thought, “No, I’d be really happy that you’d spend time with me even if it’s just dinner!” But I’m starting to feel like my sense of things is getting a little warped, lol.

Maezawa from the CEO’s office will answer as well. Thank you for your question. There’s no point in knowing what other people do. In this case, the man decided to have dinner instead of going to a hotel for his own reasons, so I think the key point is whether he discussed it with you beforehand. If he had, you could have said, “If it’s dinner only, I’ll pass this time.” If he hadn’t, then under a typical agreement, the man is responsible for failing to follow through, so I believe you could ask him to cover the agreed amount. With an adult relationship (intimate), no formal agreement is established in the first place, so this only applies to a typical arrangement. That said, in a situation like this, if the man suddenly decides that it will be dinner only, then a gentleman would normally still give you the usual allowance. He may simply not realize this, so if the change to dinner only is due to his circumstances, you could try saying: “If you need to change it to dinner only, I’d appreciate being told by the day before. If that isn’t possible, could you give me the same allowance as when we go to a hotel?” However, he may see you as troublesome, and there’s a good chance the relationship could end there. So only bring it up if you’re truly unhappy and feel you absolutely have to complain—and only if you’re prepared for the relationship to end. If you still want to continue seeing him, it may be best to think of him as someone who can change plans for his own convenience without considering how it affects the other person, and plan to end things once you find a new papa. If it had been agreed beforehand that it would be dinner only, then it doesn’t seem particularly strange for the allowance to be only the dinner amount. The important point is that the change was made for the man’s convenience.

I’m in Seattle. If he wants to make it dinner only for his own convenience, then he should obviously still give you the allowance for an adult relationship. Find another guy.

I’m Kazu, a male member. It rarely happens, but if we’re meeting for a meal at my request, I pay the usual allowance. I’ve never discussed a separate allowance for dinner-only meetings with someone I’m seeing regularly. If the meal is at her request or she’s the one inviting me, there’s no allowance.