Based on the previous answer I received, if the relationship itself is the priority, is it normal for the allowance to stay the same even when we spend the night together?
The allowance for our monthly transactional relationship hasn’t changed—they absolutely don’t provide any additional financial support, increase the number of payments, or buy me things, and even when they do, it’s only something like food.
But is it normal for them to expect me to go on all-day dates with them?
👤Asked byGuest👩GenderFemale🎂20s👑Universe female member
I don’t think there’s any one “normal” way to do things, but for reference, here’s what I do.
I never ask the woman to stay the night. If she says she’d like to stay over or go on a trip together, then we do, but I make sure to ask how she’d like to handle the allowance in that case.
So far, no one has asked me to increase it, so the allowance stays the same.
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> The allowance for our monthly transactional relationship never changes—he absolutely never provides extra financial support, increases the number of meetings, or buys me things. Even when he does, it’s only something like food.
>
> Is it normal for him to expect an all-day date from me?
I think it depends on the man, but no, I wouldn’t say it’s normal.
Since you only meet once a month, I understand why you feel the allowance is rather low. From the way you describe it, I can understand that he wants to spend as much time together as possible because it’s been a while—but he does sound like a somewhat stingy papa (a male supporter).
Since you’ve been seeing each other for five years, if he’s a close papa, you should try talking to him about it.
The woman I’ve been seeing for five years tells me whatever she wants. She takes every opportunity to ask for things—on her birthday, at Christmas, after passing an exam, and so on.
Alternatively, you could say, “I already have plans tomorrow…” and try arranging to leave earlier.
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In your case, it isn’t really an arrangement—you’re just meeting once a month.
If it were a relationship, I’d revise your question like this:
I enjoy dates lasting anywhere from 2 to 10 hours, at times I choose, for ¥60,000–¥120,000 a month, with more than three meetings (or one or two if it’s dinner only).
Overnight stays are covered by the same allowance. I don’t ask for an allowance, of course, or beg for things I want, but he buys me various things and has even provided me with a car and a place to live.
I think you enter into a relationship with someone you want to see every day—or at least someone you want to see that often.
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