Whenever I walk around busy areas of Tokyo, I’m almost always approached about papa-katsu (compensated dating in Japan).

Indeed, back in the Showa era, people used to say that it was best to get married by 25—perhaps by Christmas Eve at 24. Once you turned 26, you were like an unsold Christmas cake marked down to half price, and after 27, nobody wanted the cake anymore. But what era are we talking about? We live in a diverse age now, where happiness means different things to different people. You can get married in your 30s, in your 40s, or not get married at all and still be happy. I think we’ve become a society that respects individuality. As a result, fewer people get worked up over the same things, and even what’s considered “normal” differs from person to person. So some people may think papa-katsu (compensated dating in Japan) is normal, while others may think marriage is normal. Unlike in the past, it feels like we now live in a time when there isn’t just one definition of normal. If you don’t think it’s right for you, you simply don’t have to do it.

People from the nightlife district, huh? (lol) Everyone is different. We’re not robots, so you can’t lump us all together by simply calling something “normal.” Why not aim for the place where you feel happy? Anonymous-bashing people who have nothing to do with you is just a waste of time. Do your best and get married in your twenties. Based on your way of thinking, you probably shouldn’t come here asking questions ever again. Why do you come here? (lol) Are you actually really interested? Psychologically speaking, some people who bash strangers’ affairs online actually really want to have an affair and do sexy, pleasurable things themselves. But because they’re holding themselves back so much, they can’t stand it when others do it, so they tend to attack them aggressively. It’s such a waste. Having sexy, pleasurable fun is more enjoyable than bashing people.

I’m a regional member too. People who recruit others will probably make it sound like everyone is doing papa-katsu (compensated dating in Japan), since that’s how they attract people—but that’s definitely not the case. The idea that getting married in your twenties is best probably comes from considering things like having and raising children, as well as preparing for retirement. If you assume retirement at 60 and want your last child to finish school while you’re still in your higher-earning years, then marriage naturally ends up happening in your twenties. > Is it normal to have sex with an old man and get paid? However you look at it, that’s obviously not normal, right? (lol) But once they start dating an older man, they stop saying things like, “It’s gross,” “It’s nothing but putting up with it,” or “He’s creepy.” (lol) Instead, strangely enough, they start saying, “Dating an older man isn’t so bad after all!” Maybe that’s because they receive all kinds of benefits—not just money. That said, they do have wrinkles on their faces, gray hair, and less-toned bodies, so compared with men their own age, their looks are definitely inferior. And since they’re not exactly handsome either, I think the women they date do flatter them to some extent.

“Normal” is subjective. It may be normal to the person who told you it was normal. By the way, papa-katsu (compensated dating in Japan) doesn’t mean having sex with an old man in exchange for money. Apparently, it means looking for a papa (a male supporter).

I don’t think either having sex with an old man for money or believing that a woman’s greatest happiness is to marry normally and have children is truly normal. Have a vision of your own. Marika