Have you ever experienced such tender, blissful sex that it brought you to tears?
What was the experience like?
Have you ever experienced it with someone you met here?
You can’t really feel that kind of happiness without a deep bond, can you?
A friend recently told me that she felt completely fulfilled and so happy during sex that she cried... I want to experience that too!
I’m submissive, but when I’m only slapped or choked, I don’t feel loved. It feels cheap, or more like it’s just a game.
I want to be held tenderly sometimes, but is there something wrong with my body because I end up enjoying being handled roughly?
I accept a new offer and head to a hotel hoping for slow, loving sex, but I keep ending up with men who are rough.
What do men think when they want to hold a woman precious and treat her ever so gently?
Which feeling is stronger in their hearts: the desire to hold her tenderly and cherish her, or the desire to take her roughly and completely?
I'm Flagmaker, a columnist.
Sorry for the incredibly late answer, but I just remembered—I have made someone cry during intimacy once! It happened one time! I remember now!
She was crying and said, “No… If you treat me this gently, I’m going to catch feelings…”
That said, it’s all in the past. The woman and I just happened to end up that way back then. There’s no way I could do that now.
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I’m a male member—and a total loser.
I’m working hard because I want to have that kind of sex, but I’m nowhere near achieving it...
I’m not bad at making someone climax, but making her cry feels impossible.
Still, it’s something I truly aspire to, and I haven’t given up. If I ever find someone I can have that kind of sex with, I’ll leave the club.
There’s one woman who refuses to accept an allowance. If I can’t do it with her, I guess it’s probably impossible for me...
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I’m Shingo Lee, a columnist.
It sounds like you’re an M who doesn’t express your desires. You may assume that being an M means being passive, but building a good S/M relationship requires the M to communicate what they want.
- The kind of play you want—restraints, being treated like a dog, being teased gently, wanting to be brought to orgasm repeatedly, and so on
- What you want your partner to do—where you like being touched, wanting tenderness, wanting to feel loved, wanting to experience orgasm, wanting to orgasm from penetration, etc. If your partner is experienced, you can keep it somewhat abstract; if not, be specific.
If you truly want to feel loved, I think there needs to be some degree of mutual affection. But even with a friend-with-benefits arrangement, you can still experience a certain amount of happiness.
Feeling happy means telling your partner what kind of sex makes you happy. You can do that right before things begin, or afterward by saying, “Next time, I’d like you to do this.”
To be blunt, a lot of women like things such as choking during sex. Based on my personal experience—my own “statistics,” so to speak—I think the approach most likely to appeal to women is starting with feather-light touches on the back, then becoming rougher as things heat up, including choking during sex.
By clearly expressing what you want, you can have the kind of sex that makes you happy.
Personally, I feel happiest when we go on a date, talk while soaking in the bath, and massage each other. Then, before we know it, things begin; we touch each other in all kinds of places, have sex, take a break while hugging, and then repeat the process. Eventually, even though we’re breathing hard and struggling, we kiss while embracing each other in the missionary position… That’s what makes me feel happiest.
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Sometimes, when you have incredibly satisfying sex with someone you love, you can’t help but cry.
I’ve met two people through this site who made me feel that way.
Marika
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I’m Paper Airplane, a male club member.
If I write about women from the club, people will probably just think I’m a self-centered idiot, so—
Recently, I met a woman in her thirties outside the club, and yesterday she told me:
“I usually have a really hard time falling asleep, but I slept so easily after I got home that night.”
“I kept thinking about you over and over while I was at work during the day.”
“My friends asked me if I’d found a guy.”
That made me pretty happy. The club is great, but private relationships are nice too.
> What kind of woman do you want to hold very dearly and tenderly?
When I really like a woman, I find myself wanting to gently explore what feels good to her and how she likes to be touched.
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Maezawa from the President’s Office here with an answer as well.
> I’m an M, but if all they do is hit me and choke me, I don’t feel loved.
Maybe you’re not really an M?
Or perhaps because you say you’re an M, the other person ends up focusing too much on that kind of thing.
If you meet a new man in the future, try not to mention that you’re an M. I feel like you might then have a chance at happy, slow sex.
However, it’s also possible that this is written in your staff comments.
You could send the staff a LINE message along these lines:
“I don’t feel loved when all I’m subjected to is being hit and choked. It feels cheap, more like a game. I’d like to be held gently sometimes, but I keep being treated roughly. I accept new offers and head to the hotel hoping for happy, slow sex, but I keep ending up with rough men. If this is written in my comments, could you please remove it?”
If you do that, it should be removed from your comments, and I think you’ll stop being matched with that type of man.
If you do want things to be rough sometimes, you could continue meeting the men you’ve met so far, and meet new men when you’re in the mood for normal sex.
If it isn’t written in your comments, then I feel like the problem may be that you tell them yourself that you’re an M.
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I’m Dai, a male member.
Sex filled with so much tenderness that it brings you to tears—that would be ideal. Without romantic feelings, though, I feel it’s difficult to take things that far.
That said, even when you meet through a club, I believe it’s possible to have gentle, mutually enjoyable sex rather than something focused solely on the man’s desires—it depends on the man’s mindset.
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I’m Taro, a male member.
I suppose it depends on the person. I’m the type who wants to interact as if we were lovers, so when we meet, things—including intimacy—naturally tend to go in that direction. Some people think it’s safer to keep things strictly about money, but I’ve always ended up having complicated, emotionally involved relationships instead. Fortunately, there haven’t been any problems. These days, I’m more calmly pursuing compensated relationships, and that’s peaceful in its own way—but I haven’t been able to find a steady partner, and I’m starting to wonder if I may have lost something along the way.
As for your question, there have been times when I’ve noticed her crying during intimacy. I assumed it was simply because it felt good. The deeper the bond, the deeper the intimacy. One second can feel like a year, and you can feel even a one-degree change in the angle. I suppose that’s the result of it—or at least that’s how I understand it. I haven’t really tried anything play-oriented.
Although a dating club is a rather unusual place, I think it’s possible if you meet the right person. If you’re not looking for that kind of connection and simply want incredibly pleasurable sex that brings you to tears, then the play-oriented route would probably be the quickest. I imagine there are plenty of skilled practitioners out there. If you posted something suggestive in the comments, you might surprisingly attract your target clientele quite efficiently.
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