The other day, I had the following exchange about the allowance.

I’m Saito, a columnist ♪ She seems like she’d be a lot of trouble.

I’m Taro, a male member. I think the anonymous question box has already produced plenty of thoughtful opinions from its impressive lineup of answerers, so I’ll share my own blunt and honest take, complete with personal bias. First, I consider 5 the standard. A lot of people offer that amount, and it’s also a nice, round number. By the way, it isn’t proportional to a woman’s value. Whether she’s more attractive or has a better figure, it’s the same. I see it as compensation for an ordinary woman doing that kind of thing with a man she barely knows. From the man’s perspective, it’s simply a matter of whether he wants to meet her or not. That’s why 5 feels like a straightforward number. I get the impression that 7 is common among women who come through scouts. It feels like they’re thinking, “5 is low, but 10 is high, so I’ll split the difference.” In my experience, the serious players—women from the entertainment industry or those who have had generous (well-paying) papas—ask for 10 or more. So when someone quotes 7, my first impression is that they’re from a slightly different world—or are on the verge of being influenced by one. Even so, there are times when I think someone seems nice and I’d like to pursue a relationship with her. In that case, I accept her requested amount. Sometimes I negotiate depending on my mood, but even then I’ll anchor it around the standard figure of 5, saying something like 4–5. Obviously, once I say 4–5, it’s not going to settle at 4. If I have a good impression of her, we’ll agree at 5. On the other hand, if I feel it’s not going to work, I steer things toward declining. Sometimes I’ll say that our terms don’t seem to match. If I feel it wouldn’t be fair not to state my own terms, I’ll explain them and then decline. But in that case, I don’t say 4–5—I say 4. There’s no point in leaving room for negotiation. In that sense, I think the outcome was decided for you at the initial offer stage. Since you seem to be getting offers relatively consistently, why not try quoting a lower amount next time? If 4 is acceptable to you, I think it may be better to get the man to say something first, like, “I’m flexible—or rather, I’d like us to continue for as long as possible within a range that isn’t too difficult for either of us. What do you think?” I hope it works out for you. But if he says something like 2 at that point, dump all the food on the table onto him and run for your life. It may be bad legally and according to the club’s rules, but I’ll forgive you（笑).

I’m Tetsu, a male member. I can understand where the man is coming from. If there was a gap between the woman’s requested allowance and what he was willing to offer, then even if she said it was fine, she probably still had some dissatisfaction. So I think his point was that there was no need to force an arrangement that neither of them would be happy with. That said, there are also parts of the man’s response this time that made me wonder. If he has a set going rate for his allowance, he should have said, “Would 40,000 yen work for you?” before asking the woman what she wanted. By asking for her desired amount first and acting as though he was being considerate, the end result makes him seem like a small-minded man who was testing her. You’ve learned that men like this exist, so let’s move on to the next one! lol

I’m Date◎Yume, a male member. That’s a good question. When negotiating the allowance, I think the first thing to consider should be whether both of you can continue the arrangement. It’s important to have confidence in yourself. Of course, the more allowance you receive per meeting, the better. But if the arrangement can’t continue, it’ll only be that one meeting—or a few meetings. If it does continue for a year, the total can quietly reach three figures, after all. Keep that in mind when negotiating your terms...

Simply put, he lost interest… or maybe just thought, “No, I’ll pass.” Maybe it was the vibe you gave off or the way you talked… There must’ve been something like that. Akari

I’m Fuu, a column writer. Three in a row? That sounds tough. At this point, it depends on how you want to approach it: 1. If you really want a papa (a male supporter), lower your desired allowance. 2. Even if you get rejected, wait for an offer from a papa who agrees to your preferred amount. You’ll probably need to calmly consider how many more offers you’re likely to receive going forward and make your decision based on that.

I’m Maezawa from the President’s Office, and I’ll answer this too. I think the reason is pretty simple. > Me: “I see… How about 50,000 yen?” That part was unnecessary. In a business negotiation, gradually meeting somewhere in the middle is probably the right approach. But when it comes to relationships between men and women, each person’s pride gets involved, which makes things more complicated. Also, in this example, the man said, “That’s not going to work,” so I think it’s already a dead end at that point. So if he says that, I think it’s fine to simply reply, “I understand,” and end the meeting. If he hadn’t said, “That’s not going to work,” then rather than negotiating back and forth, I think it would be better to immediately say, “I’m okay with your requested amount.” Also, saying how much you’ve received in the past makes it seem like there are other men involved. Instead of phrasing it that way, I think it’s better to simply state the amount you want. Even if you’ve been seeing other men, generally speaking, it’s probably best not to mention that at all. That said, some people do want to hear about your experiences with other men, so you need to read the situation. For example: > Them: “How much are you asking for?” > Me: “I’d like 70,000 yen.” > Them: “I was thinking of going up to 40,000 yen.” > Me: “You seem like a kind person, so I’m okay with that.” > Them: “Really? Thank you. Shall we go, then?” Something like that, maybe?

I’m a male member, and my username is Kamihikōki. This may have nothing to do with your situation and may not apply at all, but the only woman I’ve ever turned down as a Type C was, coincidentally, someone who asked for an allowance of 70,000 yen. It wasn’t that I rejected her simply because of the allowance. Universe’s photos and videos are generally well done, and it’s rare to feel any major disconnect when meeting someone in person. But this time, I was so shocked that I deeply regretted my choice and couldn’t even consider paying her more than the other girls. While we were talking, she mentioned that she usually met most men once or twice but never continued seeing them. I thought, “Well, of course. Someone might meet her once or twice, but probably not three or four times—and not while paying that kind of allowance.” She looked so different from her photos. And when she herself asked for 70,000 yen, I figured that, given how her arrangements rarely lasted more than one or two meetings, she probably had never heard what a reasonable amount was from the men she met. I didn’t even feel like negotiating. I also felt obligated to go to a hotel, so I briefly thought that, if it was only once, I might accept that allowance. But I was already exhausted from discussing the money. Even though I usually prefer spending a long time together, we parted ways after only a few minutes. From a man’s perspective, once you feel such a shocking gap, you completely lose interest. I don’t think your situation is like that, though… As for the men’s side, I sometimes think that women who are genuinely popular are often treated generously even if they leave the amount “up to him,” so perhaps they don’t usually name a high asking price themselves. If you’re asking for more than 50,000 yen, I think it’s best to discuss it carefully. For some men, hearing that one request may completely eliminate any desire to continue seeing you.

I’m Kazu, a male member. I haven’t experienced the same situation as the person asking, but if I had a similar exchange, I think I would turn her down too. It’s not that I’m trying to haggle over the allowance. The reason it wouldn’t work even if I agreed to the man’s preferred amount is that I wouldn’t want her to force herself into an arrangement that doesn’t meet her expectations. If a woman wants 7, I think she should date someone who’s happy to offer 7. That said, if she didn’t try to meet halfway and simply said, “Hmm…if it’s you, I’m okay with that,” I’d feel less guilty, so I might possibly accept her kind offer.

I’m Dai, a male member. It certainly doesn’t make much sense as a conversation. My guess is that the man usually offered ¥30,000 or less. He probably said he was thinking up to ¥40,000 because he figured that would be enough to get the woman to turn him down. Just male pride, I suppose. Normally, I wouldn’t expect a woman who initially said ¥70,000 to compromise all the way down to ¥40,000...

I’m in Seattle. If someone is asking for ¥70,000, even if you agree on ¥40,000, they’ll probably go through the motions reluctantly, which makes it no fun and leaves you wanting to go home. Let’s just accept that he was a poor man and that you weren’t a good match.