I have a papa (a male supporter) who wants to keep track of my every move.
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We usually decide when to meet next over LINE, but when I’m unavailable, he keeps asking things like, “Are you going on a date that day?” It’s really getting on my nerves.
I end up telling him some random lie, but when we meet later, he asks, “What were you doing on the [date]?” to check.
I think he’s probably trying to make sure I haven’t lied to him.
Apparently, he cut ties with the girl he used to have a relationship with after finding out she had other papas as well.
He apparently discovered it by looking through her phone while she was taking a shower.
I know he’s a hassle, but he always wraps things up within four hours and gives me a generous (well-paying) allowance, so I don’t really want to cut him off.
I’m also thinking about finding another papa, but he checks the calendar feature on my profile too, so I can’t use it.
What should I do?
I’m Maezawa from the President’s Office, and I’ll answer this too.
> I’m thinking about finding another papa, but I can’t use the calendar feature because he checks it too.
Lots of people still receive offers even without using the calendar feature, so I don’t think you need to worry about that.
First, hide that person from your profile. If they ask you about it afterward, you could just play dumb and say something like:
“What happened?”
“I haven’t done anything, though?”
He might contact the club, but you can simply say:
“I’m not really sure how the club works…”
The strategy is to answer, no matter what they ask, that you haven’t done anything and don’t really know.
Then, when you receive offers, go on dates and gradually build up your number of papas.
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I’m Aya, a female member.
You only get a large allowance by winning over that kind of papa (a male supporter), so if you’re serious about making money, you need to put in the effort.
I tell him about several of my friends and even show him their photos so he believes they’re real people. I’ll say things like, “I’m going out with ___ today!” I also tell him I’m close with my parents and arrange for him to meet them, or tell him I’ve started a new part-time job—something made up, but easy to talk about realistically because it’s the same kind of job I actually had as a student. I use every trick I can think of and give him a perfectly detailed schedule.
papa-katsu (compensated dating in Japan) is basically a job to me now. If you’re going to do it, you can’t be half-hearted—you have to give them a perfect dream, or you won’t make serious money.
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I’m Dai, a male member.
First of all, looking through a woman’s phone while she’s in the shower is completely unacceptable, isn’t it?
You should assume that anything he did to other women may also have been done to you. Please take proper precautions to protect yourself, including against hidden-camera recordings.
Ask the club staff to make sure he can’t see your profile, and find a better man as soon as possible.
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With people you meet through a dating club, once you start feeling like you’re becoming a nuisance to each other, you naturally want to cut things off.
If the thought, “Why do I have to report every little thing?” starts to feel like too much of a hassle, you’ll probably want to fade out.
Of course, it depends on the other person.
If you want to continue, come up with an easy routine for staying in touch. If you’re thinking, “What a pain!”—cut things off when the next opportunity comes along.
—Akari
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I’m Meg, a female member.
Wow, there are really such demanding papas out there!
I’d simply hate that, but you’re doing a great job putting up with it.
Why not hide your profile from him and wait for the next offer?
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I’m Nana Ayase ♡
Sounds like you’re really loved~ I personally like that kind of all-out affection ♡
Is he your only papa? Then you have nothing to hide, right?
If you have others, you’ll need to make the switch.
This is your chance to show what you’ve got.
Good luck!
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I’m Taro, a male member.
That kind of thing is annoying, but it’s also pretty easy mode. There’s no way he can know your actual schedule. As long as you don’t buckle under the pressure and make a blunder, you can get through it just fine（笑）
If you don’t have another papa right now, you can simply be yourself. If you do, replace the event of meeting him with something else—taking a class, helping a friend, looking after a sick parent, anything works. Just use the same reason consistently and build a story around it in that world, and you should be fine. That said, tell the man as little as possible. If he points out an inconsistency, just say, “I forgot,” or “I don’t remember the details.” It’s better not to overexplain.
You can’t control the risk of a man letting his imagination run wild and cutting you off, so focus on eliminating the risk of being caught through clear evidence. For example, having message previews show up on your phone’s lock screen is completely out of the question.
Still, I feel like women are probably better at this kind of thing...
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1. Make it clear that you like your papa (a male supporter) and that he’s the only one you’re seeing.
2. Come up with a legitimate reason why you can’t go on dates regularly.
3. Once things with your papa have settled into a stable arrangement, ask him to hide your profile. If he asks, say you received a renewal notice but chose not to continue and quietly left the site.
How does that sound?
Be careful, though—if he finds out, he may cut you off.
It sounds like a hassle, but good luck.
Marika
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