It’s only natural to go to the police over some asshole who tries to have unprotected sex, right? A lot of men from the club are assholes who want to do it bare. When one asks, “Is it okay without a condom?” I usually say, “If you put it in, I’ll go to the police and report that I was raped. Go ahead and become a sex offender.” Most men are shocked and put on a condom. But afterward, they say things like, “That’s pretty harsh.” Is it really that harsh? I think it’s only stating the obvious. Generally, the only people who have sex without contraception are married couples or couples who want to have children. When money is involved and it isn’t that kind of relationship, I think being unable to understand such a basic distinction puts them on the same level as sex-crazed middle school boys.

Maezawa from the president’s office here—I’ll answer this one too. This is a very timely question. Actually, Universe Police has been established: https://universe-club.jp/universe-police/ It starts with: “Dating clubs are a community of people who want to keep crime, incidents, and accidents as far away as possible. We will not tolerate anyone bringing trouble or criminal activity into the club. No matter how frequently someone uses the club, or how famous or influential they may be, we cannot allow anyone to hurt another person. In cases of serious criminal behavior, we will not hesitate to cooperate with the police and relevant government agencies.” As for covert photography: ◆ If discovered, the club will immediately file a police report on the victim’s behalf and forcibly terminate the member’s account. Even if no photo has actually been taken, simply pointing a camera at someone or setting one up is considered a violation, so there are no excuses. The man will be required to pay the club ¥1 million, and the woman will receive ¥50,000. There’s plenty of other information on the page as well. Now, regarding the question: you are absolutely right. However, since saying it so abruptly may come across as a bit sudden, I think it would be better to add one step in between. After saying: ① “Is it okay without protection?” add: ② “Please make sure to use protection.” That one extra step can make a huge difference. If he continues pressuring you, complains, or tries to go ahead anyway, then saying: ③ “If you do, I’ll go to the police and report that I was raped. Go ahead and become a sex offender.” would be completely justified. Since he won’t listen when you say it normally, that’s understandable. However, if you skip② and jump straight to③, I worry it might simply come across as, “That’s a terrible thing to say.” Even if you ultimately have to say③, I think it’s better to include an intermediate step like②.

I’m Dai, a male member. Just to be clear, I’m afraid of diseases and wouldn’t be able to take responsibility if a pregnancy happened, so I would never ask to have unprotected sex. Honestly, I don’t understand men who try to do it without protection. That said, even I feel that wording is pretty harsh. I’m sure you’re fed up with hearing things like that from different men, but instead of suddenly saying, “If you put it in, I’ll go to the police and say I was raped,” wouldn’t it be more normal to start with, “I don’t want to have unprotected sex, so please stop”? If he still tries to penetrate you after that, then by all means say something about it being a sex crime. I don’t think you can enjoy dating while feeling this fed up, so why not take a break from papa-katsu (compensated dating in Japan) for a while?

I’m Fuu, a columnist. If something bothers you, you need to clearly say so—otherwise they won’t know. But you’ll benefit if you’re good at expressing yourself. Keep your papa (a male supporter) wrapped around your finger. Have him dancing in the palm of your hand. Still, you should phrase things with the other person’s feelings in mind. Otherwise, I’m worried even relationships that could have lasted may end up falling apart.

Just because you’re in the right doesn’t mean you can say it any way you like. It’s a matter of your own common sense. He’s definitely an extremely unreasonable man, though. Akari

Just say, “No, please put one on.” If you say it normally, they won’t tell you that you’re being rude. You’re both at fault here. It’s obvious, but the issue is really how you phrase it. Marika