The papas who call the clitoris “Clitty” and female anatomy “foo-foo” are seriously gross.
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It’s especially common among men in their 50s and older. I wonder if it’s just a generational thing? And, of course, those are always the papas who offer the lowest allowances.
What is with them?
As for the allowance, there’s nothing I can do about someone’s financial limits, but I really wish they’d fix the way they talk right now. When and how should I tell them?
I’m sure the gentlemanly male members who get selected as answerers on this Q&A site wouldn’t say things like that, though (not a setup).
I’m Fuu, a column writer.
Words are fleeting—they’re spoken in the moment and then disappear. If you don’t let it bother you, I don’t think it’s as creepy as you make it sound. You can probably solve the problem simply by letting it go in one ear and out the other.
“Those papas, especially the ones in their 50s, tend to offer low allowances.”
That’s an unusual way of speaking, so perhaps the papa you’re seeing just happens to talk that way—and also offers a low allowance. It’s not that there are many papas who both speak like that and pay low allowances.
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In another 20 or 30 years, people will probably be saying things like, “Ugh, that old lady is gross,” about the slang you’re using now.
Language varies by era and region, after all.
Personally, I don’t really like the Kansai term “omeko,” but it’s a dialect, and it’s not worth calling someone out over, so I just let it slide.
Still, it does kind of make me squirm.
Marika
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Maezawa from the CEO’s Office here with an answer as well.
I didn’t realize some people were like that.
Maybe that’s what happens when they like “that” a little too much?
> When and at what point should I tell him?
I think it would be best to tell him when you enter the room. If the atmosphere turns awkward, you can always part ways then. Saying it in the middle of things might lower his mood, somehow.
That said, as long as it’s not during the act, I feel like any timing would be fine.
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I’m Nana Ayase ♡
If you’re unhappy, why not just say goodbye?
Maybe she’s putting it a little more cutely because she feels it would be harsh to say “clitoris” or “pussy” so directly.
But since you don’t want to say anything that might hurt him and cause trouble later, just leave the message unread and ignore it quietly.
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I’m Paper Airplane, a male member who gets verbally torn apart by his favorite girl even more than by his own daughter.
If you can’t say what immediately comes to mind in the moment, then you’re probably not a good match anymore…
It means the relationship keeps putting a strain on you.
That’s what compatibility is like, I guess:
Thinking any name they call you is creepy.
Finding every conversation boring.
Or, on the other hand, having great chemistry where everything you talk about clicks and you genuinely enjoy yourselves.
And then there’s the kind of chemistry where you can say anything to each other, versus the kind where you can’t.
I suppose that’s what compatibility comes down to.
papa-katsu (compensated dating in Japan) that puts a strain on you isn’t enjoyable, is it? You might start feeling like it’s nothing more than work…
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I’m Kazu, a male member.
“Clitty” and “lady bits”—those bring back memories. I knew someone in his early thirties who used to call them that. I wonder where he picked those terms up.
It got me wondering what I call them myself. I refer to the clitoris as the “clit,” while for the female genital area as a whole, it probably depends on the context—I think I say things like “down there” or “your private parts.”
As for “those papas are always low-paying, too,” I’d think that if he’s that creepy and offers such a low allowance, there’s no reason to date him in the first place. You probably don’t need to try to change him.
Still, if you want to get him to change and continue seeing him, I’d suggest immediately saying, “That’s such a gross way to put it,” and making it clear that you’re uncomfortable whenever he says “clitty” or “lady bits.”
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