I’ve been a male member for about six months. I still often struggle with choosing a location for the first meeting and would appreciate your opinions and advice.
This content is machine-translated.
So far, I’ve usually chosen a city hotel lounge because of the pleasant atmosphere and views, as well as the fact that it makes it easy to escort her elsewhere after the meal if she accepts the invitation. However, considering that the food quality is not always particularly high and that she may worry about people at nearby tables overhearing the conversation, I sometimes feel that a private room at a restaurant might be better. For now, I often talk with her at a spacious lounge or café bar, then take her to a restaurant for the meal.
On the other hand, private rooms at restaurants can usually only be reserved with a set course, so she cannot choose her own meal. I also wonder whether some women might feel nervous about being in a private room with someone they are meeting for the first time.
I still feel there is plenty of room for improvement, and I intend to learn more through experience, but I would be grateful to hear everyone’s thoughts.
What kinds of places do you usually choose for meals and conversation on a first date?
Also, for female members, what kinds of places make you feel most comfortable and satisfied overall on a first date?
I’m Shing Lee (Shingori), a columnist.
I think meeting someone for the first time in a private room is a bad idea. It can feel quite tense until you’ve really loosened up with each other.
Sitting across from someone can heighten the tension, so I recommend choosing counter seating instead. Whether in business or otherwise, sitting side by side is a good way to get closer to someone. If you want a more luxurious atmosphere, how about teppanyaki?
At places where you can see the chef working and preparing the food, silences don’t feel as awkward. And if you run out of things to talk about, you can always use the food as a conversation starter—“I wonder what they’re making over there?”
Other places with a similar setup, such as tempura, kushikatsu, or Hawaiian restaurants, should work too, as long as they aren’t casual, everyday eateries.
(3 replies left)
(3 replies left)
💡 This question has no password registered, so the reply feature is unavailable.
If you access from the device/browser used to post the question, you may be able to set a password later.
I’m Fuu, a column writer.
I definitely prefer private rooms too. I think having other people around would make me more nervous. Female members can probably relax more when no one can overhear or watch their conversation.
Private rooms often come with set courses, but I usually choose the simplest one. If she seems uncomfortable or unable to finish, I tell her she doesn’t have to force herself. If it doesn’t seem like enough, I’ll ask, “Would you like dessert?” and check with her.
I look at the female member’s profile and reserve a private room at a restaurant serving the kind of food she likes. It’s usually Japanese cuisine, French, sushi, meat, or afternoon tea, so in my case, I’ve already researched restaurants with private or semi-private rooms.
Also, since I’m a Type C, I arrange for the room to be within a five-minute walk. If it’s farther than that, or if she comes in high heels, or it’s raining, I’ll call a taxi through an app from the restaurant to the room.
For a first meeting, the male member’s terms, appearance and personality, and ability to escort her will all be important factors in whether a female member decides to continue. Especially when preparing for that first offer, I think: “Let’s really put some effort into this!”
(3 replies left)
(3 replies left)
💡 This question has no password registered, so the reply feature is unavailable.
If you access from the device/browser used to post the question, you may be able to set a password later.
I’m a male member who goes by Paper Airplane.
I’d like to choose a restaurant she’ll enjoy, but finding a really good place can be difficult.
For restaurants suitable for Universe, there’s a well-known site other than Tabelog (which doesn’t list many inexpensive places) that has rankings based on review scores, rather than the usual rankings that simply appear in search results. Restaurants are displayed in order of their high scores, so you can find places with higher customer satisfaction than with the standard rankings.
These restaurants are excellent in almost every respect. You can choose a private room, and there are usually several options: ordering à la carte, or choosing from light, medium, and more elaborate courses.
I recommend the light lunch course most of all, but in the evening there are also several courses to choose from.
I can’t say much more without making the place identifiable, so please use this information to make your own judgment.
Also, with the usual rankings, even restaurants in the top three may have review scores around 3.5. I think she’ll be much more satisfied if you choose a restaurant rated at least one point higher—ideally as close to 5.0 as possible, and at least 4.75 for a first meeting.
Finally, rather than choosing an expensive restaurant—where you’d expect the food to be good anyway—I think choosing a well-balanced place will make the experience more enjoyable for you as well.
(3 replies left)
(3 replies left)
💡 This question has no password registered, so the reply feature is unavailable.
If you access from the device/browser used to post the question, you may be able to set a password later.
I’m Kazu, a male member.
Definitely a private room, in my opinion. Ever since I joined Universe Club, I’ve booked either a semi-private or private room for every offer, unless there’s a compelling reason not to.
As for the set menus you’re concerned about, I try to choose restaurants where you can reserve a table without ordering a course whenever possible. If a course is required, I go with a lighter one. No woman has ever told me she wanted to eat more, but if she did, we could simply order additional dishes.
Women often list foods they dislike in their profiles, so I choose the course accordingly and have never had any problems. If there’s something she doesn’t like on the day, most restaurants will probably be able to accommodate her by changing the menu.
(3 replies left)
(3 replies left)
💡 This question has no password registered, so the reply feature is unavailable.
If you access from the device/browser used to post the question, you may be able to set a password later.
I don’t think a private room would necessarily make things more nerve-racking. I’d be much more uncomfortable having other people overhear us discussing the terms of the arrangement.
Although, I suppose private rooms do tend to come with set-course meals more often… It might be a good idea to mention your preference when making the offer.
I generally dislike buffets, so if that were the case for a first date, I might want to leave. I wouldn’t even like it at a hotel breakfast.
I prefer to sit down and take my time over a meal.
Marika
(3 replies left)
(3 replies left)
💡 This question has no password registered, so the reply feature is unavailable.
If you access from the device/browser used to post the question, you may be able to set a password later.
This is Nana Ayase♡
I think she probably has that written in her profile, including any foods she dislikes or allergies she has. Please read it carefully from beginning to end.
Also, if it’s somewhere about 30 minutes by train from the woman’s home, that might work well without anyone she knows finding out.
For lunch, there are plenty of buffet-style places, so they’re easy for dining. You can also chat about things like, “They had something like that over there,” right?
(3 replies left)
(3 replies left)
💡 This question has no password registered, so the reply feature is unavailable.
If you access from the device/browser used to post the question, you may be able to set a password later.
Maezawa from the President’s Office here.
Sometimes people meet at a hotel lounge, but usually it’s just a meeting point before moving straight to a restaurant for dinner.
That said, if you meet at the lounge of a famous hotel and then move to a restaurant outside the hotel, women are often disappointed. So some men mention this when making the offer, saying something like:
“We’ll meet at the hotel, but I’ve reserved a restaurant elsewhere.”
That’s why I think a restaurant with private rooms is best. Even if there’s no private room, many restaurants have more space between tables than hotel lounges do.
Choosing a restaurant can be difficult, but men who never get complaints from women somehow always seem to know good restaurants. I wonder where they get their information.
Even the female staff at Universe sometimes say that after being taken to a really good restaurant once, they feel reluctant to counsel with other men, yet they’ll say they want to see that particular man again.
The place you choose for dinner seems to be quite important.
(3 replies left)
(3 replies left)
💡 This question has no password registered, so the reply feature is unavailable.
If you access from the device/browser used to post the question, you may be able to set a password later.
