I received an offer from the first man I met after joining the club. He’s in his 20s and only one year older than me. He gave me ¥5,000 for transportation on our first date, but when it comes to an adult relationship or dinner dates from the second time onward, he seems to think he doesn’t need to provide transportation money or an allowance.
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(He hasn’t brought up the subject at all and has just been messaging me things like, “Where should we go next?”)
What does the club usually tell men at the beginning?
I would like to go on a second date with him, but I’m hesitating because I feel it might be difficult to explain the arrangement to someone who seems to think he won’t need to give me any money from the second date onward, judging by the way he talks.
Maezawa from the President’s Office here as well.
> How does the club initially explain things to the male members?
Basically, they explain the general rules, such as:
- You must not show your member page to anyone else.
- If you take covert photos, you’ll be forcibly expelled, and the woman may report you to the police. (They’ll cooperate if contacted by the police.)
- For the first meal, the allowance is ¥5,000–¥10,000, and it should be handed over in advance.
After that, it’s essentially “free romance,” so they seem to assume that men understand they’re expected to provide an allowance without having to be told explicitly.
There may be some men who simply don’t know how things work.
Universe Club is only arranging the two people’s meeting. As for what happens after that, it comes down to what’s generally considered normal in society.
So I know this is difficult for you, but explaining it to someone like that probably won’t accomplish anything. I think it would be better to politely turn him down.
Apparently, even some older men never bring up money at all. For people like that, there’s no need to try to explain—just decline. That should be enough.
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Column writer Flagmaker here.
Let’s stay calm and think this through strategically.
That man has probably used dating apps before joining Universe, so he’s likely already had similar arrangements. If so, he’s probably familiar with terms like “adult relationship, 20,000 yen.”
If you want to play it safe, go with 30,000 yen. He may think, “I was offering 20,000 yen on the apps too, so an extra 10,000 yen is probably within reason.”
Asking for more than 30,000 yen would be a gamble—you’d have to be prepared for him to turn you down.
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I’m in Seattle.
That’s just someone looking for sex for free.
The fact that he only offered ¥5,000 without stating the amount upfront is a major red flag—a person to avoid. You should obviously ask about the allowance beforehand, and turn him down.
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I’m Paper Airplane, a male member.
Do you want to go on a date, or do you want an allowance?
Which is it?
If the man is in his twenties and only a year older or younger, I don’t think the idea of paying for sex would come naturally to him that easily.
For men, an allowance can also amount to compensation for the humiliation they feel, no matter how old they are…
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I’m Tetsu, a male member.
As I recall, the club’s rules state that you receive ¥5,000–¥10,000 for transportation expenses on the first date, and that arrangements after the second date are left up to the two parties.
If you have questions about the allowance, I think you should discuss them with the man and continue seeing him only if you reach an agreement you’re comfortable with. If your concerns can’t be fully resolved, you should end the relationship. You’ll probably regret it otherwise.
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I’m Fuu, a column writer.
The club’s policy states that, for the first meeting, men are required to give the woman ¥5,000–¥10,000 as transportation expenses. Male members are informed of this, but beyond that, the two parties are expected to discuss and agree on their own terms. That’s the extent of the club’s involvement.
It’s important to agree on the details with your partner before meeting again. If you’ve exchanged LINE contact information, you could ask, “How much allowance were you thinking?” or “I was hoping for ¥___ as an allowance—how does that sound?”
Based on the questioner’s wording, I’m assuming this is someone you’d like to meet again. In that case, you could message something like: “I’m happy you invited me and I’m looking forward to it. By the way, what were you thinking in terms of the allowance and the terms of the arrangement?”
It’s also important to ask about and clearly agree on conditions such as whether an adult relationship is involved. That way, you won’t regret it later.
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I’m Kazu, a male member.
https://universe-club.jp/female/yarimokupapa/
I thought this was about the same thing as the column here（笑）
The column talks about apps, but I’d heard rumors that Universe Club also has men in their 20s and 30s with the attitude of, “I’m young, right? That’s lucky for you, right? So it’s fine if the allowance is low—or even if there isn’t one.” I guess they really do exist.
> How does the club initially explain things to the male members?
I believe it’s something along these lines:
For the first date arranged by the club, you must always provide transportation expenses upfront (a thank-you payment of ¥5,000–¥10,000 for the date).
Dates between members are a matter of personal choice, and the club cannot force or regulate what happens between the man and woman.
If you haven’t agreed on an allowance, there may not be one. You can either confirm whether you’ll receive an allowance, or go without asking, accepting that you might not receive anything.
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