Tips
Apr 20, 2021 17:57
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We’ve met four times so far, but he hasn’t invited me to meet again.
For the first two dates, he asked me out via LINE, and for the third and fourth, we ended up deciding where to go next while we were having dinner.
Since we met for the fourth time, I’ve been sending him casual messages on LINE about once every four days, but he hasn’t invited me out again.
Would it be okay for me to ask him? Or does he perhaps want to end things with me?
Since the man is the one who pays, I hesitate because I feel it might be rude for the woman to make the invitation.
He’s very discreet and conducts himself beautifully, offers a generous (well-paying) allowance, and is someone I can meet without any stress, so I feel even more hesitant...
I’d love to hear from both women and men about how you invite someone on the next date and keep the relationship going.
7 answers
🏅 あなたの味方
お役に立てれば幸いです。
Age: Private
👨 Male
Universe staff
President Maezawa from the CEO’s office here.
> Do you think it’s okay for the woman to ask him to meet?
Absolutely.
In this case, since he isn’t asking her to meet, he may already be thinking that it’s about time to part ways.
If so, they’ll break things off even if she doesn’t ask.
So if she reaches out, there’s a chance they might meet again. And even if asking leads to them parting ways, the outcome is the same as if she hadn’t asked.
That’s why I think she should go ahead and ask.
Other
I’m a BB7 male member.
Speaking for myself, after meeting someone three or four times, unless I really like her, I start thinking, “Maybe that’s enough.”
Since women rarely say they want to meet again, things often just naturally fade out.
I don’t think there’s anything wrong with simply telling him you’d like to meet. If he still won’t see you, it’s probably best to give up. After that, it seems like it’s just a matter of your own pride.
Other
We had gone on two low-key dates, about once a month, and I accidentally scheduled something quite important to me on the day of our third date (it wasn’t another date).
I figured maybe he wasn’t that interested in me, and I was prepared to let things end there.
But then he immediately started messaging me: “That’s too bad—I was really looking forward to it. What time does your appointment end? Where is it?” In the end, he offered to drive over and pick me up at that location when I was done.
So maybe I was wrong to assume he wasn’t interested in me. (Although maybe he just wants to be intimate—and if that’s the case, so be it, haha.)
What I’m trying to say is that it’s hard to tell how much someone is thinking about you based only on your LINE conversations. I think you should try making a casual invitation, like, “Can we meet sometime?” or “What should we do next?”
Marika
👨 Male
Universe member
I’m だて◎ゆめ, a male member.
Looks like you’re seeing each other at the same pace as we are—twice a month(笑)
My approach is to exchange messages once a day, basically, from the time the relationship begins. At first, I was the one inviting her out, but after a year, considering things like her health, I asked her to send me the date of our next meeting during our daily messages.
What keeps us connected is that daily communication.
In your case, I think it would be fine to invite her out. You’ll find out clearly whether she’s waiting for you to ask or is trying to end things.
🏅 倶楽部女性のご主人様に潤いを!
Mパパ、永遠の交際継続中!
B1タイプ〜A寄りパパです!
会う度大人は嫌と感じる方………ご相談ください。
Age: Private
👨 Male
Universe member
I’m Paper Airplane, a male member.
With most women, after meeting once or twice, you usually feel that there’s no need to meet again. Since you’ve already met this man four times, I’m sure he feels positively about you too.
That said, if you only meet once or twice a month, it’s the kind of relationship that could end at any time. Unless you message him saying you’d like to meet, he may not be particularly motivated to suggest meeting again himself. And if you don’t invite him, you might start wondering whether he really likes you that much. I think he may be feeling much the same way you are.
Age: 60s
👨 Male
Universe member
I’m Basil, a male member.
I appreciate it when someone invites me by suggesting a few possible dates, since it makes it easy to settle on a plan right away. If my schedule is already filled about once a week, I won’t initiate an invitation myself, but I won’t turn one down either, so I’ll arrange something on an open day in between.
If you’re worried that he may be thinking of ending things, wouldn’t it be even better to invite him in a modest, low-pressure way? There’s also a chance he’s hoping things will just fade out naturally.
In my case, unlike Mac, I tend to back off when someone comes on too strongly.
Age: Private
👨 Male
Universe member
I’m Kazu, a male member.
I think you have to take the initiative and invite them. In my case, the people who don’t invite me properly gradually disappear from my life.