Tips
Apr 9, 2021 15:04
8 answers
Other
I’m BB7, a male member.
You can either say,
“I’m not meeting you if you won’t cover my transportation expenses,”
and end things,
or decide,
“I’m not getting transportation expenses, but he’ll take me shopping and treat me to dinner, so I guess it’s fine.”
The choice is entirely yours.
Other
I’m Aya, a female member.
This is a tough one… If you’re happy with what he buys for you, then that’s fine, but since you felt the need to post here, I’m guessing you’re not completely satisfied.
If he’s a papa you really like, I’d suggest increasing how often you meet, cutting out shopping dates so you only go on regular dates, and receiving cash more frequently instead. That’s probably what I’d do.
When you start meeting more often, a good papa may begin to feel uncomfortable giving you money in exchange for every single date, and might offer to switch to a monthly arrangement.
But if you can’t take that approach, things will probably stay as they are unless you take action yourself.
Papas understand women’s feelings even less than women expect. Apparently, unless you tell them directly, they really don’t get it at all. So if something is bothering you, it might be best to put it clearly into words. Good luck!
Other
I’m Taro, a male member.
When she said, “I just wish it would be okay without that at the end. Haha,” you could have casually said with a smile, “Then don’t make me say it. Haha.”
As for your question, I think your interpretation is correct.
I said that at the beginning, but it also sounds like you might not have a problem with it anyway, so I’ll leave it at that.
Age: 60s
👨 Male
Universe member
I’m Basil, a male member.
When he was younger, he used to shower his female friends with gifts, so maybe that’s what he considers a standard date. Perhaps he’s simply nostalgic for the past and wants something like a normal relationship without money involved.
Other
If you don’t want to meet while worrying about money every time, then give her a large upfront payment—around ¥1 million—and say, “I don’t want to pay you each time because it makes this feel like a transactional relationship and kills the mood.”
It’s a little sad that the questioner was made to feel uncomfortable after bringing up something that was difficult to say.
Men really shouldn’t put women in a position where they have to say things like that.
Marika
Age: Private
👨 Male
Universe member
I’m Kazu, a male member.
He probably just doesn’t want to hand over cash.
🏅 あなたの味方
お役に立てれば幸いです。
Age: Private
👨 Male
Universe staff
Maezawa from the president’s office here.
You’re talking about dates after the first meeting, not dates arranged through Universe, right?
If so, that man is mistaken—he’s trying to date you without giving you an allowance.
Of course, if you’re happy with shopping alone, that’s perfectly fine.
But since you’re asking this question, I assume you do want an allowance.
You want an allowance, while he doesn’t want to provide one. I don’t think that arrangement will work out.
I think you should end things sooner rather than later.
If he spends around ¥100,000 on shopping for you every time, you could sell the items at a pawnshop and turn them into your allowance, so that could work too.
Still, most women would probably prefer cash.
Some women want to save the allowance they receive from papa-katsu (compensated dating in Japan).
🏅 倶楽部女性のご主人様に潤いを！
Mパパ、永遠の交際継続中！
B1タイプ〜A寄りパパです！
会う度大人は嫌と感じる方………ご相談ください。
Age: Private
👨 Male
Universe member
I’m Paper Airplane, a male member.
I guess the shopping trip didn’t quite meet her expectations.
If the shopping amount is in the single-digit range, the man looks stingy. But if it’s in the double digits and the woman still asks for an allowance, she looks like a total money-grubber.
Which is it supposed to be…?
That said,
> “It would’ve been nice if you hadn’t said something like that at the end. Haha.”
The man should behave in a way that keeps her from saying that.
Women joined the club for a reason, so men need to understand that, when it comes to shopping costing up to around ¥200,000, an allowance or transportation money would generally be preferable. No matter how happy she may seem at the time…