I’ve been on so many dates through this club. I may actually be going on more dates with men from the club than on ordinary dates with men outside the club since joining.
This content is machine-translated.
My question is, I’ve recently started feeling uneasy about the fact that I’ve only been going on dates with men from the club. I have no desire to get married or have children, but perhaps because money is involved in every date, when a guy around my age invited me out recently—the first time in a while—I turned him down because I no longer really know what a normal date is. He was a good person, and someone I would have been happy to develop a better relationship with than I have now. (I don’t want to get married, but I do want to enjoy the best parts of romance, and I’d like to date while keeping myself feeling beautiful.)
I’m not sure whether I’m okay continuing like this, so I would really appreciate any advice. Thank you.
Maezawa from the Executive Office here with an answer as well.
Thank you for your question.
If you've forgotten what a normal date is supposed to be like, then all the more reason to go on one.
Even now, I think you should contact him and try going on a date.
Generally, men tend to take the lead on dates, so if you're not sure what to do, I think it's fine to let him take care of things.
You'll probably get your feel for it back before long.
(3 replies left)
(3 replies left)
💡 This question has no password registered, so the reply feature is unavailable.
If you access from the device/browser used to post the question, you may be able to set a password later.
I’m in Seattle.
Tell the young guy you turned down that you’ve changed your mind and want to go on a date after all. What a waste.
Unlike women, men tend to hold on, so it’s probably still not too late.
(3 replies left)
(3 replies left)
💡 This question has no password registered, so the reply feature is unavailable.
If you access from the device/browser used to post the question, you may be able to set a password later.
I’m Flag Maker, a column writer.
Typical dates in your twenties aren’t usually the kind where you spend a lot of money, right? It’s a little different in Tokyo, but when I was a student in Kyoto, we’d just sit and talk along the Kamo River near Sanjo, or do something like that. Sometimes we’d play badminton, too.
Why not try playing badminton as part of your rehabilitation? I recommend buying proper shuttlecocks, at least.
(3 replies left)
(3 replies left)
💡 This question has no password registered, so the reply feature is unavailable.
If you access from the device/browser used to post the question, you may be able to set a password later.
This is Mac, a male member.
Seriously, I think you’re perfectly fine just the way you are.
The reason I say that is because, for example, sex workers may go to host clubs to fill an emotional void. Papa-katsu is similar: if you’re missing something and a younger man has it, you’d naturally want to date him even without money involved. Since that isn’t happening, you’re probably already fulfilled. So there’s nothing to worry about.
If you only want the enjoyable parts of romance, a papa (a male supporter) is ideal. With a younger man, you also have to deal with the less enjoyable parts.
(3 replies left)
(3 replies left)
💡 This question has no password registered, so the reply feature is unavailable.
If you access from the device/browser used to post the question, you may be able to set a password later.
I’m Kazu, a male member.
A close friend of one of my partners—an “older-man killer”—once came to me for advice about something similar. Rather than doing papa-katsu (compensated dating in Japan) and receiving an allowance, she dates older men without any allowance. Since she’s been dating only older men for years, she finds dating men her own age boring and apparently turned down invitations from men her age for a second or third date.
Rehabilitation is important. I think it’s a good idea to go on dates with men your own age once in a while, too.
(3 replies left)
(3 replies left)
💡 This question has no password registered, so the reply feature is unavailable.
If you access from the device/browser used to post the question, you may be able to set a password later.
