My favorite papa (a male supporter) has been telling me for a long time that he’ll pay my rent and cover all my living expenses if I move in with him. I’m very touched by his feelings, but I’m planning to have an arranged marriage.
However, he says that once I’m married, he won’t see me anymore because he’d feel guilty toward my husband.
I see marriage and love as separate things, so I’m okay with affairs and papa-katsu (compensated dating in Japan). I’ve explained that to him, but he still doesn’t seem to understand…
I love my papa more than my future husband, so I want to continue our relationship even after I get married. I’d appreciate any advice on how I should explain this to him.
Joe here.
That’s quite a harsh way to put it. If you were an old guy like Joe, fair enough, but you’re probably young, so this may sound presumptuous. Still, I really am superior, so Joe will forgive you.
What I can’t overlook, though, is the “I don’t know what to say to my papa~?!” part. If I’d heard you say that in a bar in Shimbashi, I would’ve started lecturing you: “Save the licking for his dick!” Aren’t you glad you posted this here instead? Being young doesn’t mean you’re allowed to let your brain leak out.
Be prepared to do everything you can. First, try moving your hips more vigorously than usual. Naturally, in the cowgirl position. Sensual hip movement in the cowgirl position solves half of all problems between men and women. I’m serious!
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I’m Meg, a female member.
The papa (a male supporter) who says he’ll step back once you get married sounds wonderful. He’s someone who genuinely wants to help you move on and graduate from this relationship properly. Please cherish him.
That said, do you really have to enter an arranged marriage?
Why do you have to get married?
Who are you getting married for?
Perhaps you should take some time to think those questions through again.
I’m sorry this isn’t the advice you were hoping to hear.
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I’m Date◎Yume, a male member.
I also keep married life and dating clubs separate, so I completely understand how you feel. However, rather than starting right after getting married, I think it would be better to reconsider it with the timing in mind.
Why not prioritize your married life first…?
Then, once things have settled down, what about when your husband just isn’t enough? (笑)
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Maezawa from the CEO’s office here.
Thanks for your question.
If you got married, wouldn’t the concern be that your husband might demand around ¥4 million in compensation, making it too risky for him?
The solution is simple.
It seems you could just avoid telling him that you got married. That way, you could probably continue seeing each other indefinitely.
As for moving, I think it would be best to come up with some plausible excuse and dodge the issue.
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I’m Flag Maker, a column writer.
“I won’t see you anymore once I’m married—I’d feel bad doing that to my husband.”
I think she’s saying that just to get your attention.
Even if you do get married, I’m pretty sure you could keep the relationship going.
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I’m Kazu, a male member.
Hmm, that papa is being selfish, but so is the person asking the question（笑）
I don’t think this is something that can be resolved by changing how you communicate it.
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