I’m Maezawa from Shacho-shitsu, and I’ll answer this one too.
Thanks for your question.
Originally, we had an internal rule not to tell men how many offers—or dates—a woman had received. But then we thought, “Women who aren’t getting offers want to market themselves by saying, ‘I’m not getting any offers, so please offer me one,’ so it’s probably okay to mention it, right?”
Eventually, because we started getting a lot of inquiries from men, we settled on: “We won’t tell them the exact number of dates, but saying whether it’s a lot or a little isn’t giving them a number, so it doesn’t violate the rules, right?”
So men have gradually become able to get a general idea.
That said, they shouldn’t be receiving enough information to know about a specific recent date. Could it be that your offer date overlapped with someone else’s, and they accidentally figured it out when you changed the schedule or something?
> I’d like to know a good way to respond when a man asks, “How was your last date?”
Men like gathering information. So, while basically giving the impression that you prefer him, I think it’s best to mention something that was difficult, but keep it vague.
Even better would be something like:
“He gave me an allowance of 100,000 yen, but he was pretty pushy, so I’m really happy to meet someone as kind as you, Mr. ○○.”
When you say that, he may start thinking, “Hmm, maybe I should increase the allowance a little?”
(However, if you make the amount sound too high, he may assume he can’t compete and end the date as dinner only. But people like that are good supporters, so I think you should invite them yourself.)
Also, if you tell him he seems kind, he’ll tend to act more gently, so I recommend it. (笑)
Wait a second—am I making things difficult for some men by explaining all this?
No, most women are already doing things like this, right?
I’m Paper Airplane, a male member.
I think men can usually tell if they ask.
Personally, I don’t ask questions like that because I don’t want to hear the answers. So if someone does ask me, it might be okay to tell them a mix of some truth and some lies.
When it comes to women I see—whether they’re girls I meet occasionally or are currently registered with a club—I sometimes ask about the offers they’ve received and their current situation. In those cases, I feel that if they share at least some details, it helps me understand how to continue the relationship, making it easier for both of us to achieve what we’re looking for.
I’m Taro, a male member.
I hear that fairly often too, but it’s usually something like, “This is my first time!” or “I’ve met a few people, but they were all weird...” I don’t really believe those stories, but I don’t press them for details.
In that sense, I suppose it’s just a standard exchange, like, “How’s business?” “Can’t complain.”
It’s me.
If two men asked you the same thing, I’d suspect they’re probably friends and had already discussed approaching you beforehand.
Regardless of the truth, this is a dating club, so there’s nothing strange about both sides seeing multiple people.
I’d just brush it off lightly with something like, “Ohhh, another date? That’s a secret!” Even if they keep asking, you don’t need to say anything more.
If those questions make you uncomfortable, you can simply stop seeing that man.
If he’s at least partly trying to enjoy watching your reaction, the most effective response is not to overreact.
It’s highly unlikely that the club is leaking information about your other dates to the men.
> Mack
True! I hadn’t thought of that ^ ^
I’m Kazu, a male member.
I have a general idea.
“How was your last date?” is basically the dating club equivalent of saying, “It’s been cold lately.” Just answer naturally without worrying about it.
