I’d really appreciate some advice on a few things about intimacy…
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① There’s someone who talks to me constantly during intimacy (they apparently consider it “dirty talk”?), but honestly, I find it annoying.
For example:
・(Even though I’m already responding and making sounds) “Feel it more! Make some noise!”
・“You’re so tense…”
・“You’re so wet…”
・“You’re really feeling it…”
・“You’re twitching.”
・(While touching me) “You’re happy I’m doing this so much, aren’t you?” (When I moan) “Oh, you like it, huh? Then show me how much you like it.”
・“Are you happy I’m touching you?”
・“Aren’t you embarrassed to be in that position?”
They keep saying things like that, whether they’re talking to themselves or addressing me. What kind of mindset does this person have? Honestly, I don’t like being talked to the entire time because it’s noisy, and I find myself wishing there were some quiet moments too.
② When someone uses a vibrator or electric massager on me, how should I react when it isn’t positioned correctly? I understand that it can shift when I move, but when it’s off from the beginning, I’m thinking, “Huh? It’s not even touching the right spot…”
I’ve tried various things, like making sounds as if I’m enjoying it despite it being misaligned, taking a slightly deeper breath to pretend I’m feeling it, or moving as though I’m enjoying it to try to shift its position (although it doesn’t actually move into place…). I’d really appreciate any good suggestions.
③ Sometimes after intimacy, I’m asked, “Did you enjoy yourself?” Should I say “Yes, I did” even when I didn’t?
There are times when I’m satisfied and times when I’m not, so I’ve been wondering whether I should be honest or say it anyway just to be polite.
④ There was a discussion here for a while about “Magikarp kisses,” and one of my partners kisses me with their mouth shaped as if they were saying “oo.” Kissing naturally, like when saying “n,” is fine, but when their mouth is shaped like “oo,” it feels somewhat strange. It isn’t really my preference, but since it’s what my partner likes, is it just something I have to put up with?
I’m sorry for asking so many questions, but I’d be grateful for any advice.
I’m Tetsu, a male member.
That’s quite a specific question.
① That sounds like verbal teasing. I suppose he’s convinced that women get turned on by that kind of thing. It’s pretty painful to watch (lol). To help him realize his misconception, you should probably tell him flat out, “That’s annoying.”
② Give him specific directions, like “A little higher.” Your own pleasure should come first.
③ I think you should simply tell him how you honestly feel. If it wasn’t particularly good, though, it would be even better to show some consideration and keep quiet about it (lol).
④ If you don’t like something, it’s perfectly fine to say no.
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I’m a male member who once managed to fall asleep for nearly an hour with my partner, still joined and lying on top of each other.
① That’s a sign of a lack of confidence. You should also communicate that you don’t need to say much because you want to concentrate.
② Hold it yourself, or just say, “A little more this way.”
③ If you’ve been satisfied before, it’s okay to say so when you haven’t been able to finish. If using a vibrator or other toys is an option, ideally tell him right away—even after he’s finished—and then work toward your own climax from there.
④ Tell him that you like the way he uses his mouth.
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I’m Date◎Yume, a male member.
Haha（笑）
Sounds like fun...
When it’s too loud, wear earplugs.
If it’s not hitting the right spot, say so.
If you’re not satisfied, say you weren’t satisfied.
As for the Magikarp kiss... I guess that’s fine too...
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I’m Maezawa from the CEO’s office, and I’ll answer too.
Thanks for your question.
① Whenever he says something, it breaks my concentration, so I’d rather keep enjoying the moment without any words.
You could try saying something fairly direct, like:
“Could you let me enjoy it without talking?”
② I think it would help to guide him to the right spot.
“Ah… hehe… yes! A little to the right!”
“That’s right—more to the right!”
“Yes, now straight ahead!”
“Exactly, this way, this way. It’s okay!”
—Gundam
Something along those lines should work.
③ Maybe say, “That felt good.” (You’re not saying you were satisfied.) (笑)
④ I guess it can’t really be helped.
In gag manga, when a man is about to kiss someone, his mouth often looks like that.
(Though it usually turns out he can’t actually do it.)
Maybe he just got it into his head that that’s what you’re supposed to do?
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I’m Flagmaker, a column writer.
I’ll answer only the parts I can.
② Place your hand over his and guide him to the right spot.
③ If you say, “I’m not satisfied,” he’ll probably try too hard in the wrong direction, so I’d lie and say, “I’m satisfied♡”
I can’t answer ① and ④ because I don’t really understand your relationship with him. Still, I feel like this may be difficult to resolve.
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I’m Kazu, a male member.
① If he’s the type of guy with that particular kink, I think he’ll keep doing it until you tell him, “That’s annoying.” But once you say that, there’s also a risk he’ll get angry and end things.
② If he’s off target, you could say something like, “A little higher,” or “A little lower.” If you’re too embarrassed to say it out loud, take his hand and adjust the position for him. That seems like a way to solve the problem without crushing his ego.
③ You actually ask him? (lol)
If you’re not satisfied, saying, “I liked it better the other day,” sounds cute and might work well.
④ I think that’s just something you’ll have to accept. Repeatedly saying, “I prefer it when you say ‘n,’” might eventually fix it, but saying that would probably hurt his feelings too.
Are ①–④ all about the same person? In any case, it sounds like you’ve really been through a lot.
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