I met a truly wonderful woman among the people I offered to meet this year.

I’m Tetsu, a male member. I’ve also had a woman I’ve been seeing for a long time, but I’ve never asked her “why.” If I knew the answer, I might lose the motivation to keep trying. If the answer were “money,” it’s not like I’d think, “Okay, I’ll work hard starting today!” (lol) If anything, my feelings might cool off. Relationships between people always come with the possibility of parting ways. I understand that the longer you’ve been together, the less you want it to end. It sounds obvious, but I believe that feeling—the desire not to part—is what matters. Because I don’t want to lose her, I’ve put my heart into thinking about her and wanting to make her happy. I’ve kept asking myself what I can do to make her happy, and I believe that’s why the woman I’m seeing now has continued our relationship for so long. Even right now, a relationship could end suddenly with her saying, “I’m getting married, so we can’t see each other anymore.” Thinking too much about the future only creates anxiety. If you enjoy giving her money, then I suppose that’s perfectly valid too. But using money to eliminate your anxiety feels somehow off to me. I think what matters is enjoying the present.

I’m a male member who goes by Paper Airplane. Reading the opening, I couldn’t help thinking: “Wait… did I write this question myself?” But then I realized the number of times we’ve met is different. I’ve met her around 40 times, so does that mean I win?? No, that’s not it… After you’ve met another 10 or 20 times, I think you’ll start to see whether you’ve both become comfortable enough to show your true selves—and whether you’ll want to keep seeing each other even more, or start feeling that it might be time to meet less often. The woman I’ve met around 40 times this year is remarkably compatible with me in every way. The things I keep in mind are: - I basically never say that I want to meet first. (So on the rare occasions when I do invite her, she’s happy about it.) - After we meet, I don’t message her first on LINE. - When she says she wants to meet, I make every effort to see her. - I’ll meet her even for a short time, and I’ll also spend a long time with her when that’s what she wants. - I tailor what we do—whether it’s a hotel, a meal, drinks, having fun, or simply spending time together—to what matters most to her. When two people are compatible, I feel that their small, unspoken acts of consideration naturally come through to each other, and that they’re often happy because of it. Once you’ve met more than ten times, those feelings start to come out naturally, and I think you’ll find yourselves continuing to care for and cherish each other even more.

I’m Maezawa from the President’s Office, and I’ll answer as well. Thank you for your question. If two men are about equally attractive, I think it’s only natural that the one offering the higher allowance would be given priority. That said, even if someone offers a lot, there are still cases where a woman feels, “I’m not really interested in him.” In those situations, I suppose she may still think, “Even if the allowance is high…” You mentioned that you haven’t met her ten times, but if you’ve met nearly that many times, I don’t think you fall into the category of someone she wouldn’t want to see even for a higher allowance. If so, I think offering more would be better. However, rather than simply increasing the amount, I think it would be better to come up with a way to leave a lasting impression. For example, for your next date, you could resist the temptation to go to a hotel, have dinner only for an hour or two, and then part ways—while still giving her the same allowance as before (around ¥50,000, perhaps?). If other men haven’t done something like that, it would probably leave a strong impression. I feel women tend to remember that kind of thing. However, if she also enjoys the adult side of the relationship, it could have the opposite effect, so you should carefully assess her feelings before deciding. > If I were to increase the allowance, I think it would be best to increase it without saying anything. If she later says, “You gave me more than usual, so I’ll return it next time,” you’ll probably feel that your judgment of her was right. And you’d likely be happy if she messaged you saying something like, “I was really glad you gave me more than usual.” If she doesn’t say anything at all… You might want to consider ending things, but you could also bring it up the next time you meet by saying, “I increased your allowance last time—did you notice?”

I’m Flag Maker, a columnist. First, try solving it with money. If that does the trick, problem solved. Wouldn’t it be best to simply offer more without saying anything first? The truly difficult situation is when you try to solve things with money, but she refuses the increase. She has another papa, and you offer a higher allowance because you want to become her priority—but she turns it down. Money won’t solve it. So what do you do? lol If she refuses the increase, feel free to consult me again.

I’m Kazu, a male member. It probably depends on the woman, but I don’t think the amount of the allowance is necessarily what determines whether a papa stays in the picture. For example, I’ve heard that the allowance paid by the woman’s favorite papa—the one she sees about once a month—is actually less than what I and her other papas pay. I’ve also heard other women say that, rather than focusing on the amount of the allowance, they prioritize a man’s personality and how comfortable they feel with him when deciding whether to continue. Of course, it depends on the woman, but I think building smooth communication with her may be more important than simply increasing the allowance.