I understand that people want to ask various questions on a first date, but when the conversation turns to things like fellatio, cunnilingus, or anything that makes me picture someone’s genitals, I start to feel sick.
Maybe I’m overly sensitive because I was raised in a family where vulgar topics—including dirty talk—were strictly off-limits at the dinner table.
What do you all think?
Can you accept it as just another topic of conversation?
Is it simply something I have to put up with when doing this kind of activity?
Maezawa from the CEO’s Office here.
Thank you for your question.
It sounds like he just happened to be a man who enjoys dirty jokes. If you plan to continue seeing him, simply let him know how you feel about it, and I think he’ll try to refrain from making those kinds of comments next time.
If he can’t do that, then you’re probably not compatible, so I’d suggest looking for someone new.
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I’m Flag Maker, a column writer.
Dinner
Go to a hotel
Take a shower
Get naked and lie on the bed
Kiss ← THIS IS WHERE I GET STUCK
S*x
I’m a coward who can’t show any erotic atmosphere or have suggestive conversations at all until we get to this “point.” There are male members like this too.
A pretty common thing is that when I ask, “Are you okay with what happens next?” after dinner, she looks surprised and says, “What!? I thought you weren’t going to make a move.”
So I feel like I should start dropping a few subtle hints during dinner, but I still can’t work up the courage ^^;
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I’m Tetsu, a male member.
I love risqué jokes, but even I wouldn’t bring them up over dinner on a first date. I’d hate to make her seriously uncomfortable by starting in on that stuff right away, and if a woman started making those kinds of jokes, I’d wonder what was going on too.
Even if we were dining in a private room, there’s still a chance someone else could overhear us, so I try to avoid talking about that sort of thing as much as possible in those settings.
The man you encountered must have been completely lacking in tact. Just chalk it up to him being so preoccupied with an adult relationship (intimate) that his mind was too full of H to care about his surroundings.（笑)
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I’m Kazu, a male member.
I’ll talk about sexual topics with someone I’m close to, but I don’t think they’re appropriate to bring up with someone I’m meeting for the first time, so I don’t. I usually see how things go in an adult relationship (intimate) first, and then decide whether I’d like to meet again.
Most people wouldn’t talk about blowjobs or cunnilingus in an ordinary household, so I don’t think you’re being overly sensitive, either.
I’m curious, so may I ask: if your date were a tactless man who eagerly talked about sexual topics from the very first date, how would you handle the adult relationship (intimate)?
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