Nice to meet you. I’m a former female member.

Maezawa from the president’s office will answer as well. Thank you for your question. > Maybe he got used to it, because the allowance has stayed the same as when we used to part ways after just a few hours. He probably either forgot to increase it once, or didn’t increase it as a test and, since you didn’t say anything, assumed he didn’t need to raise it. > I thought that, but then he started booking everything—dates and locations—without considering my schedule, and only telling me afterward. You might want to try saying, “I already have something I can’t cancel that day...” and turning him down. For all his faults, I think he’s been accommodating your schedule up until now, and it seems like he’s taking advantage of your kindness. At the same time, you could add, “Could you let me know before making the reservation?” > On top of that, he expects me to be intimate with him both in the morning and at night, as if he’s trying to get his money’s worth. Hmm... I’m sorry, but I think you should probably accept that this is part of the arrangement. Rather than thinking of it as him trying to get his money’s worth, it may be better for your own peace of mind to think that he finds you that attractive. > What do the male members think? If you’re okay with ending things with this man, I think you should try breaking things off for the time being. He’ll probably ask why, so tell him everything, such as: - He doesn’t increase the allowance when we stay overnight. - I’m struggling financially, so it’s hard that he doesn’t even cover transportation. - He books trips without asking about my schedule, which makes arranging everything difficult. - It’s painful being expected to do things I don’t like. If he feels he can’t compromise, that will be the end of the relationship. But he may also say something like, “I’ll fix those things, so please don’t leave me yet.” Men generally won’t listen if you simply explain things normally. Some will, of course, but I don’t think this particular man will. It may take threatening to end the relationship before he finally starts listening seriously. Of course, this only works if you’re okay with the relationship ending as a result...

I’m Flag Maker, a column writer. Whether it’s through a dating club or otherwise, I think these kinds of relationships between men and women usually reach a breaking point and come to an end eventually. It’s difficult to find that “just-right, mutually convenient arrangement.” It feels like this relationship is approaching that breaking point, so I think it will end once I reach my limit. What do you think about re-registering, finding a new papa (a male supporter), and gradually fading out of this relationship?

I’m a male member, Basil. After nearly two years together, with intimacy morning and night and him getting aroused anywhere and everywhere, he must really be into that side of you. Or perhaps he doesn’t have anyone else. Personally, once every few months would be more than enough for me. To put it charitably, maybe he sees you as a longtime partner he feels completely comfortable with and no longer feels the need to be considerate around. However, from the way you describe it, I get the impression there’s also a strong possibility he sees you as a convenient woman who will do whatever he says—and may eventually say, “We’re lovers, so you don’t need an allowance, right?” and reduce your allowance. It may sound obvious, but you’ll have to weigh how necessary the allowance is against how much this is hurting you and make the decision yourself. If you clearly communicate what you want, he might realize it, but there’s also a risk that it could bring the relationship to an end.

I’m Kazu, a male member. As for the assumption that he sees himself as the woman’s boyfriend, I can’t relate to that man at all, so I’ll refrain from commenting. I also think that continuing to do things after being told they’re unwelcome is simply part of his personality, and I can’t sympathize with that either. Regarding these two points, his behavior isn’t normal, and since it’s part of his personality, I don’t think he’s likely to change. A common pattern in conflicts between men and women is that the woman puts up with things until she eventually explodes, while the man is left confused because he doesn’t understand why she suddenly became angry. I think men tend to assume that if something was forgiven once, it will be forgiven a second time. Speaking as another man, I’d appreciate it if you would say something when you’re unhappy about the allowance, transportation costs, or anything else. As for him making reservations without asking, why not try turning him down by saying you’re unavailable? If I were in your position and needed support, I would look for another papa (a male supporter). You could keep this man around temporarily until you find someone better. Once you find a better papa, you can tell him that you were unhappy with the way he treated you and end things. I suspect he likes you because you’re someone he can push around and ultimately get his way with. Put bluntly, he probably sees you as someone he can pressure into letting things slide. So when you bring up your dissatisfaction with how he treats you, he may try to smooth things over as usual. That’s when you need to stand your ground and remain firm. I don’t think your mistake was misjudging the distance between you. It was continuing to accept what he did even though you were unhappy with it.

I’m a male member, and my username is Paper Airplane. Based on my past experience hosting and emceeing matchmaking parties, as well as providing the kind of men’s relaxation services that men enjoy, I’d say that men misunderstand things 99% of the time—and it’s perfectly normal for them to misunderstand things 99 times more than women expect. No matter how you explain it to him, there’s a chance that the more you say, the more his misunderstanding will grow. Ideally, you’d have a man or woman you could vent to, but this may be something you can’t easily confide in even to your friends. In any case, men tend to misunderstand things even when there’s no chance of the relationship developing further. If you’ve been seeing him for two years, his misunderstanding has probably grown so large that he’s turned it into certainty all on his own. You may need to understand that as something endearing—the foolishness that comes with being a man. Also, the fact that he acts that way—because he mistakenly believes you’re that close—means he’ll probably be able to handle even harsh words from you. So rather than phrasing it like a request, I think it would be fine to speak firmly and tell him off. And generally, the longer things continue over the years, the less careful both sides become with each other, and it’s natural for the allowance to settle down as well. > Maybe he got used to it, because my allowance has stayed at the same amount as when we used to part after a few hours. On top of that, he no longer covers my transportation costs when we go somewhere a little farther away. So, in a long-term arrangement, that isn’t necessarily all that unusual. In return, I think it’s perfectly natural for you to express your own feelings freely as well. You could ask for something, request a gift, or simply tell him what you’re unhappy about. Things should be beneficial for you, too, so if you want this to continue for a long time, it’s important for you to be open about what you want and how you feel.