It seems several female members have had unpleasant experiences, such as being searched for by men they were dating. I imagine some of you may also have received LINE messages or emails from former partners pressuring you to get back together.
Recently, a female companion asked me for advice, saying, “I'm having trouble right now... What should I do?” That's the reason for this question.
A former partner is sending her four or five LINE messages a day trying to get back together.
He knows her real name, workplace, address, and the man she is currently seeing, and he is extremely short-tempered.
She has limited her replies to one or two neutral, non-confrontational messages so as not to provoke him, but ultimately she would like the contact to fade out naturally.
In this situation, what would be the smoothest way for her to make the LINE messages from her former partner naturally stop? Any suggestions are welcome.
Thank you.
I’m だて◎ゆめ, a male member.
Thank you all for your thoughtful replies. Your answers have been very helpful, and I’ve told her to read them as well.
We’ll take your advice into account and figure out how to handle this in our own way.
For what it’s worth, I suggested simply saying, “Your emails are a nuisance, so please don’t send me any more.” But she wasn’t very keen on that, saying, “What if he comes to my workplace?” That’s why I decided to ask for your help in coming up with a solution.
For now, I think it may be best to explain why she can’t meet him and politely turn him down.
I’ve also told her, “Call the police before this turns into a real incident!” So I suppose we’ll proceed while gathering evidence.
Thank you again.
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I’m Rin, a female member.
Wouldn’t it be a good idea to mention—or at least hint at—the men in your life (your father, boyfriend, or fiancé) so he becomes more hesitant? Men have social standing to consider too.
Just be careful not to phrase it in a way that makes him misunderstand and impulsively do something stupid, like getting divorced or confessing everything to his wife. Make sure the reason is always framed as being on your side.
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I’m Column Writer Flag Maker.
It’s a bit of a gamble, but I think gathering the courage to completely ignore them is one option.
They’ll probably alternate between scary messages and worried-sounding ones, then scary ones again, so it may be difficult—but try to grit your teeth and ignore everything. Keeping things ambiguous may lead them to conveniently misunderstand the situation and ultimately make things worse, so I don’t think that’s a good idea.
Alternatively, you could refuse clearly and without holding back.
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