I’m a male member. My first date with a woman I had nothing in common with was boring. I feel a bit ...

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I’m a male member. My first date with a woman I had nothing in common with was boring. I feel a bit hesitant to ask overly personal questions, so what do you all talk about when you don’t have any common topics?

ジョー・ルビコン · Answer

I’m Joe, a male member.

Why would someone continue seeing a person when the conversation never really gets going? No, I’m not making fun of anyone. I’m asking because, honestly, it’s hard for me to understand.

Is it the physical chemistry?

てつ · Answer

I’m Tetsu, a male member.

Every now and then, you have a date that really makes you realize how poor your judgment was. When that happens, I just tell myself, “This is all part of the training I need to gain life experience,” and accept it（笑).

When I’m running out of things to talk about, I try to get the woman to do most of the talking. I’ll throw out different topics—what kinds of food she likes, what she wanted to be when she was in elementary school, what club she belonged to in middle school, what her first love was like, and so on. Then, once I find the topic she seems most engaged in, I focus my questions on related subjects.

That’s the result of all my training.

前澤 · Answer

I’m Maezawa from the President’s Office, and I’ll answer this one.

Thanks for your question.

Sometimes the conversation just doesn’t get going.
You find yourself wondering what to talk about.
It happens, it happens.

Were you talking about when you were young, several decades ago?
When you were a student, you had less experience and were still immature, so there were probably plenty of things you couldn’t handle.

Huh?
No?
You mean now?

How old are you, exactly?
You’re not still a teenager, are you?

Ah, it’s a joke, right?
Thanks for the delicious material.

First, try to remember what you liked about this woman when you made her an offer.
Her beautiful legs?

I see, I see.
Then talk about that.

I’m sure you could get 30 minutes out of talking about her legs alone.
During those 30 minutes, I think she’ll gradually relax and start talking herself.

What?
Still not working?
Then you’re not smiling enough.

Start with a smile.
When your eyes meet, smile at her.
Even if it feels awkward, that’s fine.

Looking grumpy is more uncomfortable, after all. (lol)

Then talk about whatever else ultimately made you decide to make her an offer.

Hmm?
The slimness of her waist?
Can you really tell that from a photo?
I’m not sure, but—

In that case, you can get another 30 minutes out of talking about her waist.

By that point, most women will have relaxed, so I think the conversation should start flowing.

I’m not entirely sure, but I hope you’ll do your best so that all your life experience up to now doesn’t go to waste.

シアトル · Answer

I’m in Seattle.

I enjoy hearing women talk about their future—what they’re thinking about and what kind of career they want to pursue.

And if they have a boyfriend, I enjoy hearing about him too.

バジル · Answer

I’m Basil, a male member.

I’m not much of a talker, but if my partner is quiet and we don’t have any common interests, I’ll fill the silence by talking about cooking. Everyone has some connection to food, and unless she’s a chef, it doesn’t lead into probing her private life.

That said, it only works once or so.

With someone like that, even if we become intimate on the first meeting, if every date after that includes a meal before or after going to the hotel, the silences get longer, I gradually lose interest, and it often ends by simply fading out.

So I try to keep the dates to the hotel only whenever possible. When it’s just the hotel, we can say things we wouldn’t say in public, and there’s still enough to keep the conversation going.

フラグメーカー · Answer

I’m Flag Maker, a column writer.

Even when the conversation doesn’t really pick up, I try not to worry or get discouraged. I make a point of continuing to treat her kindly.

That said, it’s honestly tough when the conversation falls flat, so I book a really good restaurant. At the very least, it gives us something like, “This is delicious, isn’t it?” “Yeah.” ^^;

紙ひこうき · Answer

I’m Paper Airplane, a male member who just got scolded by his wife: “I was going to put some side dishes in our son’s lunch, but there’s nothing left! Why do you eat everything? At least leave a little for us!”

It’s true—sometimes you run out of things to talk about.

I’m a pretty quiet person myself, so when I meet someone, I usually start with:

⚫︎Talking about where to eat.

We talk about what we feel like eating and what we like, then choose a restaurant.

Once we’re there, we choose our drinks and food…

Then comes the second round of drinks, followed by the dishes arriving one after another…

Wait, is all I ever talk about food? How boring—and what a cheapskate I am(^^;;

Still, if she found it boring, I suppose I can take that as a sign that there’s no need to pursue things further.

I’m a male member. My first date with a woman I had nothing in common with was boring. I feel a bit hesitant to ask overly personal questions, so what do you all talk about when you don’t have any common topics?

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I’m a male member. My first date with a woman I had nothing in common with was boring. I feel a bit hesitant to ask overly personal questions, so what do you all talk about when you don’t have any common topics?

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