When do you start getting bored with or losing interest in someone? I’d like to hear from both men and women. When I read the questions here, I envy how many people seem to have such devoted feelings for their partners. I suppose that means they don’t lose interest, but in my case, I lose interest quickly and have never been able to maintain a relationship for long—two months at most, even when we have good physical chemistry. I’m not even sure what exactly I’m losing interest in or how to improve things... I do enjoy being in relationships, and I often travel to various places with my partner. Is it because I’m incapable of deep affection?

I’m Flag Maker, a column writer. Regarding Paper Airplane’s answer, it seemed likely to invite criticism and misunderstanding, so I’m taking the liberty of explaining it. The “eternal love” mentioned here refers to “eternal love” from Paper Airplane’s perspective—not, by any means, eternal love from the woman’s side. They also say that “the affection you give comes back to you as eternal love, as if doubled.” But they’re probably just interpreting the occasional small return of affection that way. Still, you could say that’s exactly what “love” is. That said, since Paper Airplane has been divorced several times, the phrase “eternal love” unfortunately doesn’t carry much credibility coming from them. Even so, Paper Airplane is still learning and searching for “eternal love” to this day. Sorry for explaining you without permission, Paper Airplane lol.

I’m Basil, a male member. I’m in a similar situation myself, so I can definitely relate. With most women, my feelings naturally cool off over time. At first, we’d meet at a hotel, have a meal before or afterward, and make plans to see each other again. Then it would become hotel-only, followed by only meeting when she contacted me instead of me inviting her. Eventually, we’d usually just fade out of each other’s lives. There have been a few favorites I continued inviting for more than six months. But ironically, that’s when they’d be the ones to end things, for various reasons. On the other hand, there are also women I’ve lost interest in but have continued seeing for more than two years. I’m fairly flexible with my schedule, so I keep them around as convenient backups when another woman occasionally cancels at the last minute or turns down a new offer. If I’ve already booked a hotel, I sometimes call them over so the reservation doesn’t go to waste. I’ve realized there’s no need to fixate on one person, since I can always make new offers and find replacements. I just go with whatever I’m feeling at the time.

I’m Paper Airplane, a male member whose eternal love continues forever. It really comes down to two types. Some people stop feeding the fish once they’ve caught it, while others keep feeding it no matter what. You’re probably just the former type. The grass always seems greener elsewhere. And your partner can sense when you’re unwilling to show them affection. The latter type grows fonder of their partner the more often they meet, allowing the relationship to become increasingly enjoyable. The love they give comes back to them many times over, like eternal love returned in kind. P.S. Flag Maker, Thank you for the explanation. To clarify, I meant that my eternal love continues with my divorced ex-wives as well—in a sense, we still have an important relationship that we can’t completely break away from. As for the women I’ve met through the club, it hasn’t been long since I joined, so that remains to be seen. By “eternal love,” I meant the women I started dating before joining the club…though perhaps some of the club women will become that way too. What I wanted to say is that whether it’s my wife or my girlfriend, growing fonder of her as the years go by is the reason—or secret—to keeping those feelings from fading. If you can continue giving selfless love and affection without expecting anything in return, love can last forever…

I’m Maezawa from the president’s office, and I’ll answer as well. Some men want to build a long-term relationship with one woman, while others want to date a variety of women. Of course, it’s really just a matter of which way someone leans. Most men probably want both: to date different women while also hoping for a long-term relationship. So I get the impression that you simply lean more toward wanting to date a variety of women. In that case, it may not be that you lose interest. Rather, once you start seeing one woman, you simply feel like looking for someone new. If you’re troubled because you want a long-term relationship but can’t seem to maintain one, why not try dating a more demanding woman? Being swept up in the whims of a demanding woman might help you discover something new about yourself.

I’m だて◎ゆめ, a male member. In my case, unless I’m turned down, I tend to keep the relationship going. It’s not that I get bored or lose interest—I think of it more as having an important female friend, plus something more. She just happens to be someone I was introduced to through a dating club. She’s a very important person to me, so I suppose you could say that I’m seeing her with genuine feeling and sincerity… She was one of several candidates who happened to come into my life, but things like physical compatibility or appearance don’t matter much to me. If I ask, “Would you like to date?” and she agrees, “Sure,” then that settles it. (笑) Rather than worrying about whether your feelings are strong or weak, why not reconsider how you view the relationship itself?