I exchange LINE contacts with men at the end of a first date, but if we keep messaging without him actually inviting me out again, does that mean he has no intention of seeing me again? Or since we’re still in touch, can I assume he doesn’t dislike me and suggest dates or places that work for me?

Maezawa from the President’s Office here. I think it’s important to consider which of you brought up exchanging LINE contacts. If the man was the one who suggested it, it likely means he exchanged contact information because he wants to see you again. In that case, I think you should send messages like: “Would you be available to meet on the [date]?” or “When can we meet again?” Men are usually happy when a woman invites them out. However, if he has a personal rule of only meeting one woman twice a month, he may reply with something like, “I’m busy that day, so maybe next time.” So if you invite him around three times and your schedules never work out, you may need to read between the lines a little and try contacting him again the following month. That said, even if he initially intends to meet only twice a month, he may end up meeting you three or four times if you invite him repeatedly. So I think it’s a good idea to find a natural way to lean on him a little. If the woman was the one who suggested exchanging contact information, it’s hard to tell whether he only agreed reluctantly or whether she simply happened to bring it up first. In that case, it might be better not to invite him out too often. > I’m confused because about half of them don’t lead to a second meeting. If you tell them that you’d like the next meeting to be dinner again, more of them may not lead to a follow-up. I’m shy around people myself, so I’d like to wait until we’ve gotten a little closer before asking. You could say something like: “I’d like to have dinner together one more time next time, because I think we’ll open up to each other more then. Would it be okay to have an adult relationship at the third meeting?” Unless you clearly communicate that you’re intending to pursue an adult relationship (intimate), they may think, “Dinner only is basically the same as Type A, so I’ll look for someone else.” If things don’t progress after you’ve had an adult relationship, there may be another reason. It might be helpful to post another question with more details.

I’m Flagmaker, a columnist. As other respondents have mentioned, I think the best approach is for you to make the invitation. That’s probably just the kind of man he is.

I’m “Paper Airplane,” a male member who leaves scheduling the dates to the woman and doesn’t contact her to ask to meet. For an arrangement to continue, the woman’s feelings are important—since the man already likes her enough to make an offer—so I think it’s smoother for her to reach out when she wants to meet and set the pace herself. These days, I don’t contact women I’m seeing to ask them to meet, either. That way, the woman can end things whenever she wants, or meet whenever she wants and at whatever pace suits her. With Type B arrangements, where the woman chooses based on chemistry, I think it’s even more important for her to reach out when she wants to meet.

I’m Tetsu, a male member. As a man, it’s always nice when a woman takes the initiative and asks you out. Try making the suggestion yourself. No invitation even after chatting → she’s not interested in me → contacting her starts to feel like a chore → things naturally fizzle out. You’re entering a negative spiral.

I’m Kazu, a male member, and I was startled when my date told me the exact same story as the question I answered. If you’re still in touch, why not ask, “When can we meet next?” I’m not really the type to ask first when we should meet again, either.