Is it normal to celebrate the birthday of someone you’re seeing on an ongoing basis?
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Some people celebrate each other’s birthdays, but often, they don’t even know each other’s birthdays.
Still, when there’s no birthday celebration, the relationship usually ends by naturally fading away, probably because it’s a superficial relationship.
I’m Marika, a female member.
I’ve always been the one receiving, so I’ve never really given them anything in return. Since they’re all married, I figure they’d just be inconvenienced if I gave them gifts.
Instead, I celebrate with sparkling wine they can enjoy in the room and a small cake, then tell them I’ll give them plenty of attention in bed. They seem happy with that.
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I’m Tetsu, a male member.
Personally, I don’t expect to be celebrated on my birthday.
That said, I may not be “normal,” so I’m not against birthday celebrations. If I happen to learn a woman’s birthday during our conversations, I’ll remember it and celebrate it when the time comes. I suppose it’s a kind of social courtesy.
I don’t think knowing someone’s birthday—or not knowing it—has anything to do with how close your relationship is. If anything, I’d be more put off by a woman who kept dropping hints about her birthday.
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Maezawa from the CEO’s office here as well.
I think everyone has a different stance, so the best thing to do is ask the other person directly.
That said, I feel many people would say something like:
“I’d like to celebrate the woman’s birthday, but you don’t need to do anything for mine.”
Or, “A simple birthday message is enough.”
But I haven’t conducted any statistics, so I can’t say for sure.
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I’m Paper Airplane, a male member.
I think that when you’re someone a woman naturally wants to tell or talk to about things in her everyday life—her birthday, landing a job, passing an exam, getting her first contract, making her first sale, or other personal successes—you can naturally celebrate together with words, a toast, or a congratulatory LINE message. That kind of relationship is likely to continue.
As an extension of that, I also think exchanging various gifts can be perfectly fine.
I never told any of the women I was seeing on an ongoing basis when my birthday was, so I only mentioned it when the subject came up afterward. (There are still some who don’t know.)
For the past several years, the only birthday presents I’ve received have been from my wife.
Since money already changes hands between men and women at a dating club, I think presents there are ultimately just an extra for both sides—they have nothing to do with continuing the relationship or increasing one’s favorability.
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I’m Kazu, a male member.
I’m old enough that I don’t really mind whether anyone celebrates my birthday or not. If someone does, I’ll gratefully appreciate the thought.
When a woman tells me it’s her birthday, though, I feel a little pressured. I’m not attentive enough to make a note of someone’s birthday when I happen to hear it. If I notice it through LINE or something, I might give her a small gift.
So, to answer the question: I wouldn’t say it’s the norm. It’s more a case of, “Some couples may celebrate birthdays.”
Adding this after reading Riichi’s answer:
> I don’t like it when someone makes their birthday into a major event and keeps emphasizing it.
That’s exactly how I feel too. Though, to be honest, I don’t think I’d stay involved with someone who was the type to make a big deal of it.
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