I’m a little scared about having sex with the man I’m seeing because of COVID. As the number of cases in Tokyo keeps rising, I find myself hesitating to meet him. On the other hand, he doesn’t seem too concerned, so it’s hard to bring up. I want the allowance, but what if I end up getting COVID? Every time he contacts me, I find myself wondering about it. Sorry if this is a strange question, but what do you all think about sex during the pandemic?

I’m Meg, one of the female members. No matter whether it’s COVID or anything else, if someone I adore invites me out, I’ll go see him—even through fire and water… (Okay, maybe that’s a bit dramatic.) I’m going!!!

Universe Tokyo’s Mamiya here. I don’t personally worry about COVID at all, so I’m probably not the best reference, but I’ve heard that vaccines can’t actually eradicate a virus. Since then, I’ve accepted it as humanity’s fate that we have to coexist with COVID without being afraid of it. For example, chlamydia is a bacterial infection, so apparently it can be cured with medication. Something is scary when you don’t know what it is. I think the reason ghosts are frightening is that you can’t see their true nature. If you’re more afraid of losing income because of COVID, then I think it’s better to do papa-katsu (compensated dating in Japan) while fully understanding the risks of meeting someone.

Aizawa, Sub-Chief at Universe Club Tokyo, will answer as well. Rather than being a difference between men and women, I think it really comes down to differences in how each person thinks. Many of our male members have decided not to participate until things settle down with COVID, while more women are coming in to register because their income has been reduced and they’re struggling financially. When people have different views, it can be difficult to understand each other and find a compromise. Do you want to stop because you’re afraid of COVID, or do you want to continue because you’re having financial difficulties? I think the first step is deciding what you yourself want to do. Either choice comes with risks. If you continue, you should take steps such as having your partner check their temperature too, installing a COVID contact-tracing app, and being thorough about washing your hands and gargling. If you don’t continue, you should still take action to reduce the risks, such as cutting back on expenses to protect your finances or looking for a part-time job that involves less contact with other people. You can’t have it both ways by saying, “I don’t want to go on dates because I’m scared, but I still want the money.” I think it’s best to make your own choice and then take steps to reduce the risks that come with it. I work because I need the money, but since I work in Tokyo and I’m worried, I use alcohol disinfectant and wear a mask. When I get home, I take a bath to wash away anything that may be on the surface of my body. If that still isn’t enough, I just tell myself, “Well, there’s nothing I can do!” I’d be scared of being publicly attacked if I caught it in a place like Iwate, so I wonder if I’d think differently if I lived there...

I’m Flag Maker, a column writer. I’m currently assigned to a sales position, so I have to meet clients in person and the COVID restrictions aren’t as strict. But if I were assigned to our head office in Marunouchi, catching COVID would practically get me treated like a “sinner.” I do go on dates, but I try to choose restaurants and transportation options where I’ll have as little contact with other people as possible. If you look around, there are still plenty of good places for dates during times like these. COVID or not, men just can’t suppress their sexual urges.

I’m Maezawa from Shacho-shitsu, and I’ll answer as well. Many women tend to be cautious. When the number of COVID cases rises, I think more women lose the desire to meet or prefer to avoid meeting in another prefecture. Some even seem to think, “Is this man okay?” when a man doesn’t seem concerned. It feels like the difference in how men and women think is becoming quite apparent. Of course, some women may think more like men, and some men may think more like women. Many men seem to think: “There’s a possibility of getting infected, but it’s not like you’ll catch it that easily. It’s become less virulent, so even if you do get infected, you’re unlikely to die that easily.” Perhaps the idea that men instinctively go hunting despite the risks while women protect the home is part of human nature—and maybe that’s one reason humanity has been less likely to go extinct. Whether you can ask for an allowance without meeting probably depends on how long you’ve been seeing each other. If the relationship hasn’t been going on very long, I think it would be difficult. So you could also choose to think, “If I’m worried, I won’t meet him—and I won’t accept an allowance either.” Of course, there is also a possibility that the relationship itself may end, so I think you should consider it carefully. But I believe it’s important to make a decision you won’t regret.

I’m Paper Airplane, a male member. It really is scary, isn’t it? I do feel that I need to be cautious too, but maybe it’s because I don’t drink—or because I don’t go to hostess clubs or izakayas… Lately, I feel like I’ve been getting more invitations from women to meet up, especially around Obon… After reading the question, I thought, “Ah, that makes sense…” And then I realized, “Oh, maybe it’s because I don’t drink and don’t go to nightlife spots (even though all the girls can really hold their liquor)…” So I found myself thinking that maybe they want to meet someone who seems safer than they are?? If the other person seems safer than you, or reasonably trustworthy, then perhaps you should meet them while accepting that there’s always some risk involved… Back in April, whenever we met, we spent half the day glued together in a hotel without stepping outside even once—but as a space, that’s safer than going out and about. > @Flag Maker Ikumi, the blue-cheese girl, is on Shin-Konsan Irasshai right now… She said, “When I first met him, I thought I was going to marry him”… Does that mean handsome men get a wider range of leeway??