I’m a married woman who works in the nightlife industry.

Maezawa from the Corporate Planning Office here as well. > A lot has been discussed, but is it really such a bad thing? I don’t think anyone was saying it was “a bad thing.” It seemed more like the point was simply that some people won’t make offers through a dating club. There could be various reasons, but I imagine some men think there’s no need to pay a matchmaking fee because they can meet women by going to the establishment directly. In other words, I think the point is that many men on dating club platforms are looking for women they can’t meet anywhere other than through a dating club. That said, this only applies to some people. Even if a woman is registered, I believe most men will make an offer if they genuinely like her. In the end, it comes down to the woman’s own appeal.

I’m Joe, the columnist. A little late to the party, as usual. Since dating clubs are highly individualistic, I don’t think you need to worry about it too much. At most, just keep in mind that some gentlemen aren’t into nightlife workers or married women. And this may be beside the point, but I don’t trust people who say, “I’m not prejudiced.” Why? Because Joe himself is full of prejudice—and, more importantly, unconscious biases are difficult to recognize. Refusing to acknowledge them is a problem too, but it’s much healthier to assume you have some prejudice. As for the question, Joe is extremely prejudiced against both nightlife workers and married women. Unfortunately, that just makes me even more worked up. So I’m off to do something about it. Yoko, wait for me! P.S. Mac, you’re still quite the p*** hound! I’d love to follow your example, Mac, but unfortunately my d*** just won’t cooperate. P.P.S. Rin, I have absolutely no disagreement with you. At the moment, I’m out in the rain fishing with an F-cup nightlife worker and a married woman. I don’t know if that has anything to do with it, but your words are hitting me even harder than usual.

I’m Paper Airplane, a male member. As for the person asking the question, perhaps nightlife work and the club can both be places of refuge… Men are divided into those who go to pachinko and clubs/hostess bars, and those who don’t. They’re completely different types of people. I might go to pachinko once every 20 years just to kill time, but even if someone offered me tens of thousands of yen an hour, I would never want to go to a hostess bar. So I have no interest in women who work at clubs or hostess bars. Going out with one? I wouldn’t want to do it even if I were dying. I also hate the idea of people assuming I’m on a companion date when they see me walking with a woman. (When I’m walking around with a girl from the club, they probably do assume that…) > Don’t male members ever use hostess bars for entertaining clients? Seeing that wording, I almost wanted to reply, “That’s such a ridiculous question that I’ll pass…” Hostess bars = places I’d want to escape from within two seconds. I don’t feel like writing about places that cause me pain. P.S. Neither men nor women can ever understand the opposite sex 100%. More precisely, our desires are completely different… So, in this world, both women and men can put on an act around the opposite sex, because the other person won’t know what’s really going on. P.P.S. Flag Maker, Hostess bars, adult entertainment, and men’s relaxation spas are all valuable places to meet people, aren’t they? As for hostess bars: Have they been smoking less lately?… Even so, there’s the alcohol, crowds, karaoke, and the fact that people around you can hear your conversations… I’m still not comfortable there. It’s hard to relax, so I’d rather avoid them… For some girls, working in a place where they have to constantly interact with other women is also difficult, so quite a few end up moving into men’s relaxation spas. Both men and women are divided between the hostess-bar type and the men’s-relaxation-spa type. The fact that men’s relaxation spas exist is a real blessing… Though, of course, they still fall under the category of nightlife work… I think it’s a good thing that different “types” and different “spaces” have come to exist. At a men’s relaxation spa, you can have a relaxed conversation in a private room for over an hour, which is nice. There’s no need for a companion date, no need to keep going back, and no money has to change hands. As a place to meet young women, it’s valuable—and because there’s absolutely no guarantee that things will lead to anything, it feels fresher than the club. Another appeal is that sometimes you come across beautiful women who probably wouldn’t be available through papa-katsu or the club.

I’m Basil, a male member. This isn’t about right or wrong—the reality is that there’s little demand among male members for married women who work in the nightlife industry. Married women come with added risks, and if I wanted to see a sex worker, I could simply visit her workplace. So I personally have no desire to meet either through a dating club. When I’m looking for an ordinary, down-to-earth woman, having women like that mixed in is honestly just a nuisance to me. Of course, some men don’t mind, so I can’t go as far as saying they shouldn’t register.

I’m RIN, a female member. Which one makes you feel more judged—being a married woman or working in the nightlife industry? Both come down to personal preferences and compatibility, so I don’t think there’s any need to feel pessimistic about either. I don’t think there’s any logic in saying that it’s acceptable for married men to go outside their marriage, but that married women are somehow disgusting. Of course, ethically, both are wrong—but surely everyone comes here fully aware of that. As long as someone is managing their everyday life, work, housework, childcare, and social obligations, whether they’re single, married, or divorced, it’s nobody else’s place to criticize what they do. Anyone who takes pride in and responsibility for their work is admirable, whatever that work may be. Joe and Papua, As you said, society is built on prejudice and discrimination. I also feel that Japanese people tend to be envious. Whenever I say this, people often respond with, “Well, that’s because you’re ○○,” but there are many things only the person involved can truly understand—being subjected to insults about how dirty, smelly, or harsh their work is, for example. There’s no job that’s beautiful in every way. Still, whatever the profession, if it’s something you chose, all you can do is carry it out responsibly and proudly. I believe you should hold your head high and keep moving forward. It’s not anyone else’s place to interfere. That’s all I wanted to say.

I’m Marika, a female member. Basically, I have no prejudice whatsoever toward any profession. Like Romane, I respect anyone who works hard at their job, whatever that job may be. As for married women, just as Flag Maker said, some people like them and some don’t. Regarding women who work in nightlife, I was actually surprised by the male respondents’ reactions. I just thought, “Huh, more people avoid them than I expected.” This is purely based on my impression, so I’m sorry if it sounds offensive, but I think the goal of nightlife work—especially for successful hostesses—is to get men interested and increase sales without becoming physically involved with them. And when it comes to girls who use their bodies to boost sales, isn’t there actually a tendency to look down on them, or even see them as foolish? Dating clubs are intended for romantic or mistress-type relationships, and adult relationships are basically part of the deal. Some people take pride in having a papa (a male supporter) who only takes them out to dinner without any intimacy, but I can’t help feeling that’s slightly beside the point. If someone from the nightlife industry registers because, separate from work, she wants to meet a man privately, or because hostesses have desires too, then she’ll probably be welcomed. After all, it’s an industry with many attractive women. But if she’s thinking in terms of extending her work—figuring out how to get as much money as possible without becoming intimate—she’ll likely be avoided at a dating club. Also, sweet, easily deceived men can be completely taken in by beautiful women, so some men may think it’s better to avoid women from the nightlife industry altogether. I should also add that a fair number of men at dating clubs prefer ordinary, non-professional-looking girls over exceptionally beautiful women. I don’t think they’re discriminating against women based on their profession. Still, it may be worth keeping in mind that some people simply prefer to avoid them. P.S. I’m honestly too flattered that Romane would say something like that about me. I’m humbled. P.P.S. Joe and Papuwa, the people I look down on are those who don’t work. Working to make a living is noble, whatever the job.

I’m Flagmaker, a column writer. Was there really that much debate about married women being troublesome? I’m sure people have all kinds of opinions. Some want to avoid married women, while others find them more exciting. “Your ○○ is better than my husband’s!” Say more lines like that, and let’s get more people to appreciate married women. Increasing the number of people who like married women is the most realistic solution. The netorare genre is well established now, so let’s spread the word about the appeal of married women even more! The two women I was dating two years ago are both married now. The other day, one of them messaged me, “Sex with my husband is kind of boring. I guess I prefer someone more erotic after all.” That really got me excited, haha. P.S. Whether it’s a cabaret club or the adult entertainment industry, if you focus on the women themselves, you’ll find some genuinely good ones. I understand why some people aren’t comfortable with cabaret clubs. I used to feel the same way. But once, I told a senior colleague who made a living charming cabaret hostesses, “I’m not really comfortable with cabaret clubs. They just don’t suit me personality-wise…” He said, “Cabaret clubs are what they are. Basically, they’re places where you pay to meet cute women. The money you spend is simply a ‘meeting fee.’ And you have strengths I don’t. I’m good at keeping things lively, but you have a knack for smoothly getting close to women. Just bring out that strength of yours at a cabaret club.” That made me feel so much more at ease. Ever since then, I stopped feeling uncomfortable with cabaret clubs when I started thinking of them as places where you pay to meet cute women. It’s the same with anything, really—it basically comes down to one person meeting another. The other day, a refined-looking girl who resembled Tao Tsuchiya was assigned to me, and I got really excited. I almost thought about introducing her to Universe Club. Actually, everyone should give cabaret clubs a try too, haha. Not many people smoke these days, either. The flashier and more high-energy the girl seems, the more serious and grounded she often is underneath. That’s a pretty common pattern. And it’ll help you get better at keeping conversations flowing. > Mac That sounds good, haha. I have a lot of memories in Nagoya, so I’d like to go out there again soon.(^^)