I'm a male member named Paper Airplane.

I’m Hikokuki, a male member. Thank you all for your comments. Everyone explained things so clearly and thoughtfully. I found myself agreeing with a lot of what you said, and I could really feel your kindness and warmth. Thank you so much for all the lovely comments m(_ _)m That it’s reassuring when the man brings it up first, when he hasn’t asked about the woman’s wishes, the allowance amount he has in mind, how things actually proceed, the right timing to bring it up, and the points many of you shared about how it may come across to the woman— I also really appreciated your detailed explanations of the different ways men and women think about allowance, how it may be perceived, and the various possible scenarios, along with your specific experiences and advice ^m(._.)m BB7’s explanation made things very clear. > ① “Any amount you feel comfortable with…” > ② “I’ll leave it up to you.” > ③ “I ask for at least 〇〇.” > In the case of ③, the women tend to be more professional, > and I don’t have many good memories. That’s exactly right. Thinking about it, the women who already have a set amount, or who immediately name a figure like in ③, have never ended up continuing with me. Even when they can state an amount, the women who have a harder time saying it, like in ① or ②, are more likely to settle on a reasonable, not overly high amount. The enjoyment and comfort of spending time together are completely different. About what Rin said: > If they’re someone you suddenly find yourself > thinking about in everyday life and wanting > to see again, the little things stop bothering you. It’s nice when either of you can meet whenever you suddenly feel like seeing the other person. Basil, I also had one major failure. > There was one woman who wanted 7, > and I hesitated because of it. > Maybe she thought I was being stingy, > because in the end, she turned me down. The women who readily agree to 7 usually say yes without hesitation. But then I thought, “Huh? She looks completely different from her photos. Oh man, what a huge mistake…” I figured I’d just go to the hotel quickly, give her the allowance, and leave as soon as possible. Then—wait, 7…? Huh? Seriously?? She was the zero-point woman I wrote about in my column… No wonder she was constantly taking new photos… There probably wasn’t a single man who stayed with her… honestly… We parted ways almost immediately after meeting, but I can only imagine how stingy she must have thought I was… Shunkashuto said: > I get incredibly nervous while waiting > for the woman to reply, lol. Ah, right… That’s true. It is nerve-racking, isn’t it… Mac, reading everyone’s comments gave me courage, and I no longer hesitated to do things the same way you do. Thank you. Even with rent and everything else, I feel that in Kansai, half of what things cost in Kanto wouldn’t be unusual, so except when dealing with someone from far away, I’m going to follow the Kansai approach.

I’m Meg, a female member. It’s probably best if the gentleman brings it up himself, isn’t it? In my case, he handed me an envelope and said, “Is this amount okay? Please check.” As for the amount, I was honestly thinking, “Wow! This much…?” So I’m very grateful, especially since I’m in the club’s oldest age group. > To “Lost in My 60s” I’m sorry about the other day m(_ _)m I’m deeply moved that I can once again read your gentlemanly answers… > To “Spring, Summer, Autumn, Winter” Nice to meet you. I always enjoy reading your answers. The barcode incident… Hmm? Was it really an incident? It just reminded me of that… My apologies m(_ _)m

I’m a BB7 male member. When I’m making an invitation, I usually bring it up toward the end of the meal, but first I ask the woman what she has in mind. There are three patterns: 1. “Whatever you feel comfortable giving is fine…” 2. “I’ll leave it up to you.” 3. “I ask for at least ___.” As for satisfaction with the arrangement afterward and how long it continued, even when the amount was the same, I’d rank them: ① > ② > ③ With the third pattern, the women tended to be more professional, and I don’t have many good memories.

Maezawa from the Corporate Planning Office here as well. You’ve probably wondered, “What do other people do?” The best approach is to ask the woman directly. However, many women may hesitate to state their actual preference when asked, worrying that their expectations might be higher than the man’s or that they’ll be seen as only interested in money. In that case, it’s better for the man to make an offer. But here’s the problem: Even if the amount is a little low, women are often good at putting up with things, so they may agree anyway, compliment the man, and say they’d like to see him again. Anyone who takes that at face value is probably new to dating clubs, so this may be preaching to the choir, but she may not meet him a second time. Or she may meet him twice while deciding whether he’s right for her, then not show up for a third meeting. Sometimes, even after seeing someone regularly for a long time, she may suddenly stop replying six months later. Naturally, that means she’s reached the limit of what she’s willing to put up with. (In reality, she probably met a man offering better terms.) So even if the man is the one deciding the amount, I think it’s important to consider the woman as well rather than thinking only about himself when making an offer. Ultimately, as long as the other person isn’t dissatisfied, that’s what matters. Men also need to gain experience and learn what level of allowance is likely to work. Men who think, “What a hassle,” probably aren’t suited to dating clubs. They’d likely be more satisfied going somewhere with fixed prices. I think the people who can truly enjoy dating clubs are those who find the interaction between two people—including these negotiations—fun, and who are capable of showing consideration for the other person.

I’m a lost man in my 60s. Since it’s been a while since I’ve gone on a date from a new offer, I thought I’d look back on my past experiences. In my case, most of my offers have been Type B, and things never progress to anything more on the day itself. So my approach is probably a little different from everyone else’s. I generally meet for a meal, whether lunch or dinner. I’m the one who brings up the terms of the arrangement, usually around the time we’ve finished dessert. First, I tell her how many times a month we could meet. Then I ask, “If we were to move on to an adult relationship (intimate), what would you have in mind for the pay-per-meeting allowance?” Most women replied, “I’ll leave it up to you.” I would then say, “I understand. I’ll make sure you won’t be disappointed.” And that would be the end of the discussion. Of course, there were cases where a specific amount was mentioned, but nothing outrageous, so I agreed. That led to second dates, and in some cases, the relationship has continued. There was one case where I disappointed a “black” woman, but that was after we had already moved on to an adult relationship (intimate). I thought, “How much more could she expect?” lol > To Meg: Thank you. Please don’t worry about it... Rather, I’m grateful that you gave me another chance to be here.

I’m Rin, a female member. I’m not very good at bringing things up myself either, so I appreciate it when the other person does. Personally, I find Basil’s approach easier to respond to. I also like Flagmaker’s approach, where I decide the amount and the woman decides what the relationship involves. At the end of the day, if it’s someone I find myself thinking about in everyday life and wanting to see again, the little things don’t bother me as much.

I’m Basil, a male member. When it comes to this activity, I have three rules for myself: 1. I don’t tell anyone that I’m doing it. 2. I don’t reveal my identity to the other person until I feel I can trust her. 3. I set a ceiling for the allowance, since otherwise there’d be no end to it. The standard allowance is 4 or 5. Occasionally, I’ll add 1 for an overnight stay, the transportation costs for the first meeting, a special birthday gift, or medication. Whether I offer 4 or 5 depends on my mood, but if she asks for 5, I agree without hesitation. If she wants more than that, I pass. Once, a girl asked for 7, and I did hesitate, but perhaps she thought I was being cheap, because she ultimately turned me down. As for how I bring up the allowance, once we’ve finished the main meal, it goes something like this: 1. “Since we’ve had the chance to meet, why don’t we start seeing each other? Of course, since this is the kind of arrangement it is, I’m not expecting it to be dinner only—are you okay with that?” → Woman: “That’s fine.” 2. “You have some time after this, right?” → Woman: “Yes.” (Or: “Would it be okay to start next time?”) 3. “As for the allowance, I’ve generally offered the women I’ve seen 5 in total, including what I gave you earlier—4 in some cases. Would that be okay?” → About 70–80% agree immediately. Of course, sometimes the woman brings up what she wants during step 1 or 2. In those cases, though, she often asks for a higher amount—at least 5.

I’m Flagmaker, a columnist. If you simply offer the amount the other person wants and behave courteously, anyone can keep an arrangement going. But maybe you’re getting tired of that kind of thing, too? Sorry if I’m mistaken ^^; I got tired of it myself. I realized that whether it’s pay-per-meeting or a monthly arrangement, any relationship with the terms more or less fixed will eventually become boring. So lately, I’ve been doing things this way: “I’ll pay whatever monthly amount I can afford, but the woman decides the terms of the relationship—including how often we meet and how often we have an adult relationship (intimate).” In other words, she can adjust things however she likes to make the arrangement worthwhile for that month’s allowance. Of course, the monthly amount goes up or down depending on my finances. Sometimes I feel that the frequency of our meetings or adult relationship (intimate) doesn’t quite match the monthly amount. But that’s because I’m not attractive enough as a person—that is, the problem is with me. I’m simply not a man who offers enough value for the number of meetings and the frequency of adult relationships (intimate) I want. It’s just a thought experiment, but this way, I don’t ask anything of the other person and can handle everything on my own. I never feel dissatisfied with the woman, and it also motivates me to work on myself. I decide the money myself. The woman decides the terms of the relationship herself. That’s how I’ve been enjoying papa-katsu (compensated dating in Japan) lately—casually and without putting too much pressure on myself.