I’m a college student seeing a 50-year-old man under a monthly arrangement.
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I’ve developed real feelings for him, and when we’re at a hotel during a trip or at his place, I end up cuddling up to him on my own.
I don’t think he dislikes it.
What do men generally feel in a situation like this?
Does he think I’m hinting for something?
I’d really like to know.
I don’t mean to be asking for anything, but recently he said, “Let’s go shopping together sometime.”
Maezawa from the Corporate Planning Office here as well.
> I wonder what men are feeling in that situation.
I think it depends on the relationship between the two of you, but it’s probably something like this:
He’s honestly happy, but if there’s a significant age gap, he may feel a little self-conscious about other people’s eyes when you’re out in public. He may also be telling himself things like, “She’s only acting this way because I have money.”
That said, I don’t think he feels negatively about it, so you probably don’t need to worry. It should be fine to stay close to him as you have been.
He may sometimes feel that you’re hinting for something, but even then, I think he’s taking it in a positive way, so it shouldn’t be a problem.
> I don’t mean to hint for anything, but recently he told me, “Let’s go shopping together sometime.”
That’s probably how he acts toward a woman he likes. I think you should simply continue seeing him as you have been.
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I’m Flag Maker, a column writer.
I imagine they feel both happy and guilty about it. Maybe they increase the amount they pay to ease that guilt?
I’m starting to lose track of what “normal” even is anymore（笑）
> Meg
Don’t handle it yourself—wait for someone to call you out.
That joke fell flat（笑）
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I’m Meg, one of the female members.
So cute~
There’s just no other way to describe how adorable she is~
It’s only while you’re young, you know~
When you can curl up like a kitty and have someone dote on you!
Maybe I should try imitating her…
What?
You think women in their 40s can’t do that?
Who on earth thinks that?!
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I’m Basil, a male member.
I can usually tell whether it’s an act, so I don’t mind it when someone genuinely takes a liking to me. Feel free to be as affectionate as you like.
I find questions like this warm and endearing, much more so than complaints about the allowance amount.
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I’m Hikōki, a male club member.
That sounds fun—good for you!
I don’t think you need to overthink anything.
If the man you’re seeing, who’s turning 50, is genuinely in love with you, he has plenty of life experience and is probably entering the age when he’s most popular, regardless of the club. If you compare it to cherry blossoms, he’s likely enjoying a few years of full bloom, freely and to the fullest.
From the man’s perspective, anything goes.
From the woman’s perspective, it must feel reassuring to have everything in place.
I think this is a time when you can both simply be yourselves and enjoy it naturally.
That said, since he can give you an allowance through the club, I think the key to making things last is to be somewhat reserved about shopping and purchases—enough that he feels you’re not taking advantage of him.
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