After an online date, I’ll be meeting a male member in person for the first time. I’m a woman in my 20s registered as Relationship Type B.

I’m Flag Maker, a column writer. If you have no intention of having an adult relationship on your next date, why not think of a way to turn him down without making him feel bad? I’m not saying you should be pushy, but I do think it’s good manners to bring up an adult relationship on the second date or later with a Type B arrangement. After all, the allowance is different. - “I think you’re a really wonderful man, but I’m not quite ready yet… Maybe on our next date♡” - “I’d really like to today, but I have to get home early… Maybe next time♡” - “I’m making you wait today♡ Next time, okay? I’m looking forward to it♡” Something like that, perhaps? (笑) If he’s someone you absolutely can’t deal with, I think it’s fine to quietly leave him on read or block him afterward, then let the club know.

Maezawa from the Corporate Planning Office here as well. > From the man’s perspective, would he consider the online date our first date and this one our second? You received ¥5,000 for the online date, right? In other words, that was your first date. If you spent a month exchanging updates about your lives roughly once a week, I don’t think that would technically count as dating. However, if you became closer during that time, he may count it as part of your dates. So when you actually meet in person, he may feel as though it’s your fifth date—though that’s stretching it a little. > Personally, I’d like to decide about anything after dinner only from the second meeting onward, once we’ve met in person. But if he considers this date our second, I’m a little worried that he might ask me. I think it would be best to tell him that now. If you don’t say anything, he’ll probably treat this as your fifth date in terms of counting, and there’s a good chance he’ll ask you. However, if you explain it beforehand, he’ll likely understand that you want to consider anything after dinner only from the second in-person meeting onward. > I’m registered as relationship type B, but recently I’ve had men ask me about anything after dinner on the first date. Men who ask on the first date don’t understand the relationship types. They probably don’t understand why types B and C are separated. They’re the kind of people who assume, “It’s okay if I ask,” and break the rules based on their own judgment. They’re unlikely to be good partners. Men who ask type-B women about anything after dinner from the first date are only thinking about themselves, so I think you should be careful. A gentleman would never ask a type-B woman on the first date. > I keep encountering men who take the attitude of, “So it’s understood that anything after dinner is expected when we meet for the second time, right?” Since type B says “from the second meeting onward,” a man asking on the second date doesn’t necessarily mean he misunderstands the relationship type. He may interpret “onward” as meaning that any date is acceptable. But if you needed, say, ten meetings before deciding, people would start wondering how that differs from type A. The word “definitely” reflects the man’s ego. Still, I hear that most women can tell the moment they meet someone, “I’m just not attracted to this person at all.” With that in mind, you probably need to be prepared to make a decision by the second meeting. (This is only about being mentally prepared; it doesn’t mean you have to decide after two meetings.)

I’m Basil, a male member. Since the club doesn’t count the first date after an online meeting, I naturally consider it the second date. In my experience, I’ve had three online dates with B-type women. During each one, I explained that I was looking for someone open to something more after dinner. The results were quite varied: - The first was open to it from the start. - The second didn’t work out—I felt she might secretly be an A-type. - The third was dinner only at first, but open to more from the next date onward. I also tend to follow the pattern you described in your question. Basically, I don’t pay much attention to the differences between relationship types; I make offers to women I like and invite them in the same way. The only difference is that if a C-type woman isn’t open to anything on the first date, I’ll generally give up, whereas with a B-type woman, I’m willing to wait once.

I’m Paper Airplane, a male member. I think you can get a general sense online of the man’s overall vibe, cleanliness, and so on, so I’d suggest deciding to some extent in advance how you want to handle things. I often make offers to B-type women as well, and with in-person dates, I’m fine with having dinner only for anywhere from two or three dates to seven or eight. Actually, I’m fine with it for as many dates as the woman wants. With online meetings, it can sometimes feel like you’ve already met each other two, three, or even four times, so if it’s your first in-person date after meeting online and you really hit it off, it could feel more like your fifth or sixth time meeting. That said, since men choose B type, I think it’s normal for them to approach things cautiously, so I believe the woman can control the situation to a considerable extent through how she interacts with him. Being approached for more is arguably part of the fate of being a B-type woman, so you might consider cutting off any man who can’t wait until the third date. Many B-type women struggle with the same concern as you. In that case, with online meetings, I’d suggest judging things based on how it feels when you meet in person. If you find yourself thinking, “Wait, haven’t we already met several times?” then it’s possible the experience will be completely different from a typical date.