Maezawa from the Corporate Planning Office here as well.
I think you’re wondering whether, although there are financial benefits to continuing to see this man, if he has a health condition, the drawbacks may outweigh the benefits.
As things stand, the disadvantages seem far too great, so I think you should tell him honestly and have him seek treatment.
However, he may react angrily and claim that he caught it from you.
If that happens, he could also make a false report to the club, which might result in only you being banned.
It’s an extremely difficult situation.
To prevent that, one option would be to say nothing and end things with him, while reporting the situation to the club so that no one else is harmed. (I think it would be better not to ask the club to confirm it with him.) Even though it may be financially painful, this seems like the safest approach.
The next-best option would be to tell him directly something along the lines of:
“I’m going to get treatment as well, so I’d like you to get treated too. I also hope we can continue seeing each other often after we’ve both been treated.”
Then you could leave the outcome up to him.
You may end up parting ways, or he may react angrily and treat you as the person responsible. But if things go well, it seems possible that you could continue seeing each other.
I’m Rin, a female member.
It depends on the type of STD.
Candida is a naturally occurring fungus, so it can flare up depending on your health and vaginal environment. But if it’s something else, and you haven’t had any other partners, then it most likely came from him.
There’s no point unless both of you receive treatment. Otherwise, it will continue spreading—from him to his other partners, and then to theirs, and so on. These infections don’t heal on their own.
So I think you should tell him clearly that you want him to get proper treatment. This is especially important for women, as STDs can cause infertility. Chlamydia often progresses with few or no symptoms, and in recent years there have been more serious cases where symptoms that would normally be limited to the genital area have also appeared in the throat.
In any case, both partners must be treated together. That’s an absolute rule.
Please take good care of yourself.
P.S.
Maezawa-san, because women are at a disadvantage, simply cutting off contact without telling the man isn’t necessarily the best approach.
As long as that man remains a member, you can’t prevent him from infecting other women. If you don’t tell him, it serves no purpose.
If the questioner has only been with him, then he must have other partners.
Continuing with him as things are now won’t benefit you in any way. Treatment costs and the emotional burden can be extremely difficult, but I think you should tell him, even if you’re prepared to end the relationship, and report the diagnosis, the man’s identity, and his response to the club as well.
A reasonable person should seek treatment. If he doesn’t, then it’s fine to consider it the end.
I understand that you must be furious, but please put your own health first. You’re young and still have your whole future ahead of you.
I also hope no one else becomes infected through this man.
One more note:
The difficult thing about STDs is that many of them progress without symptoms or with very few noticeable symptoms.
Depending on the diagnosis and the symptoms you currently have, the timing of the infection can vary. And if the partner has had more than one partner, it can be difficult to identify the source.
That said, if he is infected too, it will certainly continue spreading from him to his partners and then to theirs. So both of you must receive treatment.
I’m a male member from Seattle.
If you don’t tell them, you’ll just keep reinfecting each other back and forth, so you have no choice but to say something. That person is definitely the source.
There’s no point continuing to see someone who isn’t clean. Once you’re completely cured, you can decide whether you want to start seeing them again.
